The Haunted
by Dragon Mistress
Summary: The sequel to ‘Black’. Sirius and Remus thought their bloody past was finally buried. But now, two decades later, it looks like someone knows their secret.... and this someone is looking for revenge. NOTE: Has become an R!
1. Return of the Past

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the Harry Potter characters. Dang.  
  
**Warnings:** SB/RL SLASH; AU; no magic, no werewolf-ness; language.   
  
**Summary:** Sequel to Black'. Sirius and Remus thought their bloody past was finally buried. But now, two decades later, it looks like someone knows their secret.... and this someone is looking for revenge.  
  
To save space, the above applies to **ALL** chapters of this story.  
  


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-The Haunted-  
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Chapter 1 - Return of the Past  
  
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Remus Lupin-Black, professor of literature at the University of London, shouldered his bag and scooped up a large pile of books, files, and his students' latest essays. He left his classroom and headed down the corridor, shoes clicking pleasantly on the marble floor, sunlight slanting across the corridor in wide bands. Remus truly loved teaching, and today had been no exception. He had enjoyed holding a discussion with his students over Shakespeare's sonnets. They were all very bright kids, enthused over the subject matter, and Remus sometimes wondered why he had never met people like them while he had been attending school.   
  
He pushed open the front door with his shoulder, emerging into the late afternoon sunlight. He crossed over to the faculty parking lot, but stopped when he saw someone leaning against his car. It was a tall, slender man with waist-length black hair, dressed in a pair of form-fitting blue jeans and a black t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up. His ears were pierced, and he had a tattoo of intertwined Celtic symbols on his left arm. Remus smiled and hurried over to greet his husband.  
  
Hello, love. Sirius Black bent to kiss Remus' cheek. Good day at school?  
  
Yes, very good. How was it at the garage?  
  
Sirius relieved Remus of the heavy books he had been carrying, pulling open the back door to dump them on the seat. Same as usual. Hot and loud. No complaints.  
  
You're off early today.  
  
Bill's got it covered. He practically pushed me out the door as it was. Said I shouldn't keep the love of my life waiting, even if it was a bloke. He pushed a strand of hair behind his ear. At least I had time to wash up before walking over here.  
  
You didn't have to, Remus said, pleased anyway. Sometimes, even after twenty years, he had trouble believing that Sirius truly wanted to be with him, despite everything Sirius said or did to prove so. Of course, it was silly; they had been together since the age of sixteen, and neither had ever once cheated on the other or even entertained thoughts of it. It was a perfectly peaceful marriage on the whole, though they did occasionally hit a rough patch, but all relationships couldn't go perfectly.   
  
I wanted to. Besides, gotta keep in shape, Sirius said cheerfully, folding his long, lanky form behind the steering wheel of the small car with an easy grace that spoke of long experience. Remus climbed into the passenger seat with a laugh, and they headed for home.  
  
---  
  
Remus and Sirius' life together had not been as peaceful as it seemed from the outside. They had met in a back alley when they were sixteen - Remus a meek, bookish schoolboy trying to hide from the older students who made his life hell, Sirius a sarcastic, cynical punk with a violently abusive father and a cigarette always parked in the corner of his mouth. Sirius had come to Remus' rescue several times when the bullies were bothering him; he had also seduced Remus with his mysterious manner and unfathomable attitude. Eventually, one-sided affection became pure love on both parts and the boys became lovers - and the bloodshed had started.   
  
Two of Remus' chief tormentors, Augustus Williams and Brendan O'Shea, had turned up dead. Both had been stabbed several times, and their bodies had been moved from the places where they had died. After weeks of fear and of searching for answers, Sirius had admitted to Remus that he had murdered the boys. It had come as a large shock, and the news that Sirius' father knew was even worse. And before Remus could even begin to cope with all that knowledge, Mr. Black himself had found the two boys in bed together.  
  
Horrifying' couldn't even begin to describe what had followed. Mr. Black had accused Sirius of killing Williams and O'Shea, threatening to turn in the knife he had found - which was, in fact, the actual murder weapon. He hit Sirius first, and then hurt Remus in an attempt to get Sirius to give himself up to the police. He injured both boys quite badly before Remus managed to stab him with Sirius' knife. Even then, Mr. Black hadn't died, but chased them downstairs as they struggled to call for help on the kitchen phone.   
  
Remus still saw Mr. Black in his nightmares every now and then, looking like he had that long-ago night. The man had been covered in gore, dripping all over the floor, the knife still protruding from his back. Even bleeding to death as he was didn't prevent him from trying to kill his son before dying himself. The only thing that had saved the boys had been the arrival of Sirius' mother and brother, whose sudden appearance distracted Mr. Black in the few vital seconds between life and death.  
  
The boys had faced a murder trial after finally being released from the hospital. Only a blind person would have been in doubt that Mr. Black's murder was done purely in self-defense, since the boys had appeared in court bandaged and bruised, and the jury had ruled in their favour. With Mr. Black's affairs in order, Sirius' mother and brother had moved to Germany to stay with family, but Sirius remained behind with Remus. It had been by silent agreement that they never talked about what had happened, but they couldn't stop the recurring nightmares. These had grown significantly less over the years, some months worse than others, but on the whole, Remus felt he and his husband were putting it behind them.  
  
No one but Sirius and Remus knew the truth behind the deaths of Williams and O'Shea. It had been so long many people had forgotten the case, or at least their involvement in it all. And that was exactly how the two men planned to keep it.  
  
---  
  
Honestly, I can manage - Remus protested, following Sirius into the house. The raven-haired man was carrying all of Remus' things, a bag of groceries balanced precariously atop the teetering stack of files. Siri, you're going to -  
  
Ouch! Dammit!  
  
- Hurt yourself, Remus finished, as Sirius dropped the files and groceries on the table and bent to rub his bumped shin. I tried to warn you. He kissed Sirius' forehead. Let me put these away and get changed, okay? Then we'll cook supper together.  
  
Sounds good, Sirius smiled. Remus carried his files and bag off to his study, then headed to the bedroom he shared with Sirius. He took off his neat blazer and tie, hanging them up in the wardrobe, then pulled off his shoes and slipped out of his trousers. Dressed only in his white button-down shirt, he rummaged in the wardrobe drawers and extracted a bulky, oversized tan jumper and a holey, paint-splattered pair of jeans. He slid into the soft, worn jeans and exchanged his white shirt for the jumper. He rolled up the sleeves and put on his favourite old pair of slippers before heading downstairs.  
  
Sirius was unpacking the groceries when Remus entered the kitchen, his hair pulled back in a loose, messy braid (effective only to keep it out of the way while cooking). Remus took the opportunity to wrap his arms around his lover, pressing his cheek against Sirius' back and inhaling his warm scent. Sirius reached back to hook one arm around Remus' waist, using the other to put groceries away in the cupboard. You're awfully affectionate tonight.  
  
Am I? Remus asked innocently. One mischievous hand rubbed Sirius' hip. I guess maybe I am.  
  
Sirius closed the cupboard and turned around, pulling Remus close and kissing him hard. Remus kissed eagerly back, hooking one leg around Sirius' waist in an effort to bring them even closer, moaning softly into Sirius' mouth. Sirius tugged impatiently at Remus' jumper, wanting it off, but neither of them wished to let go of each other long enough to get rid of it. They broke the kiss, breathless and panting, and Sirius attacked Remus' neck next, planting kisses as Remus' fingers fumbled to undo Sirius' jeans and slide them down. Sirius growled against his skin, thrusting his hips forward, loose strands of hair falling into his eyes. They kissed again, fiercely, doing their best to pull each other's clothes off as lust overrode all else.  
  
But a loud crash caught their attention, Sirius' head jerking up and Remus hastily withdrawing his hand from Sirius' crotch. They stood stock-still for a moment, listening hard; it was completely silent once more.  
  
Remus whispered.  
  
Sirius shook his head, zipping up his jeans and taking a few steps towards the kitchen door. He peeked cautiously around the frame, then looked back at Remus. Everything looks okay in here. I'm going to check out front.  
  
Be careful, Remus said nervously, attempting to straighten his mussed hair. He followed Sirius into the parlour as his husband opened the front door, flipping on the porch light.   
  
Who's there? he called. Remus marveled over how firm Sirius' voice sounded. If he had been out there instead, his voice would have been shaking like anything. There was no answer, and Sirius shrugged. Doesn't look like anything, Remmie. I - He stopped talking, looking down at the ground. With a sigh, he bent and scooped something up - it was a large rock, with a note secured to it by a rubber band. He stepped out onto the porch and groaned.  
  
Looks like this is what we heard, he said, coming back inside with the rock. Left a damn good dent in the door, I'm going to have to see what I can do about that.... He began unwrapping the note from the rock, a small smile on his face. Let's see what this is about, shall we? Neighbours too scared to make their anti-gay feelings known by daylight, I don't doubt... Sirius shook the note open and began to read. The smile faded off his face rapidly and he turned white. Remus' stomach was suddenly full of nervous butterflies.  
  
What is it, love?  
  
Sirius looked faint. He held the paper out to Remus before sinking to the floor and putting his head in his hands. Remus swallowed hard and smoothed the note with shaking hands.  
  
_ To Mr. Sirius Black, Greetings.  
  
No doubt you will find this note an unwelcome intrusion into your life, but I simply cannot abide sitting around and doing nothing any longer, knowing that you are capable - in fact, guilty - of murder.   
You are wondering how I know this, when you and your lover have done such a - as you thought - good job covering up the whole mess? I have my ways, Mr. Black, and I personally witnessed one of these murders when you and I were but sixteen years old. I have kept my silence for two decades, but I am afraid I am unable to keep it much longer. As of yet, I have no proof to offer to the police, besides my word, which sadly enough is not sufficient to even arrest you on. But be advised, Mr. Black - I shall continue my investigation, and as soon as I have proof I shall not hesitate in reporting to the authorities.   
  
Until then - adieu.  
  
A Friend'_  
  
Remus put the note down, suddenly aware that he had broken out in a cold sweat. He dropped to his knees beside Sirius, putting his arms around the other man. Don't worry, love... it's just a lie... he said, but his lips were numb as the words passed them. Sirius drew a long, shuddery breath.  
  
It can't be a lie... it can't be, no one else knows but us... Sirius ran his hands through his long hair, trying in vain to stick stray strands back into the braid. He's not... God, Remmie, he knows... He looked into his lover's eyes, plainly terrified. I... what are we going to do? I'm a murderer... I deserve to go to prison, even be executed - but you, Remmie... they'd lock you away for not turning me in... I can't... I wouldn't forgive myself if your life was ruined because of me! He blinked furiously, trying to hold back tears. Remmie... I can't -  
  
Remus pulled Sirius into his arms. Shh, my love, he whispered. Shh... don't do this to yourself... You're not going to prison. Trust me. We'll call the police... tell them someone's harassing us... they'll catch whoever it is...  
  
One note is hardly harassment, Sirius said bitterly. They'd demand to see it, anyway, and after they read it, what do you think they'd do? This note could lead to some very nasty questions, and people would be digging into a past we'd rather have left alone. D'you really want to bring that up again? How long d'you think they'll let you keep your job at the university, if you're a suspect in a twenty-year-old murder investigation?  
  
Remus swallowed hard. He hadn't thought of any of that until Sirius had spoken. He didn't want to lose his job - it wasn't the money, Sirius brought in enough for them to survive on - he was anxious for his students, and he loved his job. He couldn't imagine what he would do if he was forced to quit teaching. Then what _are_ we going to do?  
  
I don't know. Sirius sighed. I suppose we could wait for this person to reveal himself... but what can we do to make him keep quiet? It doesn't sound like he's interested in money. And I don't want to... to kill him to shut him up... I swear it, I don't want to kill anyone ever again -  
  
I know. You won't have to. Remus squeezed him gently. We'll find a way to stop this. And we don't even know if this person knows for sure. A lot of kids suspected us the first time, didn't they - this note-writer could be one of the kids l used to know, making up stories for no reason. He might be operating only on suspicion, lying about everything he knows, just to see how we react. Did you think of that?  
  
His husband's painfully tight grasp loosened slightly as he considered this. Yeah... yeah, you might be right. After all... I know there were a few people who've known me all my life and never liked me much... the kind of people who enjoy making other people uncomfortable, you know.... He got to his feet. Despite his confident tone of voice, he was still pale, and was biting nervously at his bottom lip. Remus stood and kissed him.  
  
Let's go eat, he said firmly, taking Sirius by the hand and leading him into the kitchen. You'll feel better with some food in you, come on....  
  
But the uneasiness didn't go away so willingly that night; even as he lay in bed after love, with Sirius in his arms, Remus kept worrying the same thoughts over and over in his mind. What if the note-writer really did know something? What would he do? How could they convince him to keep quiet? And what could this person possibly be after to bring up something like this, after it had finally seemed to be put to rest?   
  
Remus fell into an uneasy sleep, haunted by strange dreams in which the ghosts of Williams, O'Shea, and Sirius' father came back to haunt him, jerking awake every few minutes just to close his eyes again and fall back into the same terrible dreams. Sirius was likewise restless, tossing and turning.  
  
---  
  
And not far away, another man was having trouble sleeping. Not a surprise, he was an insomniac. In an effort to drowse off, he was sitting in his darkened kitchen drinking a glass of warm milk and paging slowly through a book with yellowing pages. It was a yearbook. He stopped on a page near the middle, looking down at a photo of two boys and two girls. One of the girls had long red hair and the other shoulder-length gold curls; one of the boys had messy black hair and wore spectacles. The other boy had short, shaggy light-brown hair and a shy smile. The four teenagers were laughing into the camera, their arms around each other's shoulders.   
  
The man sat and stared at this photo for a long time, his eyes locked with those of the light-haired boy. As he stared at the photo of a young man he had once known, his lip curled. Whenever he saw that smiling face, it brought another face to mind - this one dark and brooding, framed by long black hair, a cigarette between its lips. He hated the dark face. The dark face had taken the purity and innocence from him, destroyed his life. But he was determined. He knew how to get rid of the dark, and when he was finally able to do it, he would do his best to restore what had been taken from him at such an early age.  
  
The man smiled to himself and drained the last of the milk. Suddenly, he felt pleasantly drowsy. He'd have no problem sleeping tonight.  
  
To Be Continued....  
  
---  
  
(A/N: I must be totally honest. I did not know The Haunted' was the title of an actual movie until _after_ I was almost done this chapter. And by then, I really didn't care. It fits so well with the plot I have in mind that I'm not going to change it. No offense to those of you who like the movie The Haunted'.  
  
Time to comment. I have finally confirmed the rumours I've been hearing about the title of Book 6, and yes, it's going to be Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince'. I guess to some the title sounds overly dramatic, but I think it's intriguing. I can't wait to see what's going to happen, but judging from that title, it doesn't sound like the book will deal with Sirius' inevitable return. I guess we'll be waiting until Book 7 for that. More concerns of mine: Will Luna Lovegood play a bigger part? I hope so. What about the Gryffindor Quidditch team? With Umbridge gone, Harry's lifelong ban is lifted. But Fred, George, Angelina, and Alicia will be gone. Katie's staying on, I suppose, and obviously so are Harry and Ron - who else will be on the team? Ginny wants to be a Chaser (I hope she makes it), but we'd still need two Beaters and another Chaser. And I very much hope JK will explain why NO ONE but Harry seems to be mourning Sirius' death. Is that a clue? Maybe the Order's not mourning him because they know he'll return? Sigh. We'll be waiting awhile for the answers to these questions, because as far as I've heard there's no planned release date yet. You can go to 's UK branch to sign up for an email notification as to when Book 6 becomes available. That's what I did.  
  
Enough of that. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! Please review, and I'll see you in Chapter 2!)


	2. Old Wounds

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
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-The Haunted-  
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Chapter 2 - Old Wounds  
  
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Professor Lupin-Black? Er - Professor?  
  
Remus looked up quickly, startled, coming out of a deep reverie and feeling his cheeks heat up as he saw all his students staring at him. He berated himself silently for daydreaming during class and forced a smile. Yes, Annamaria?  
  
He turned his thoughts back to the lesson as Annamaria asked him questions about the required reading. He normally didn't tune out during class, but the events of last night were still fresh on his mind. To his relief, Sirius had been calmer when they got up that morning, but Remus would bet everything he owned that the note was still on his husband's mind. It was gnawing away at Remus, that was for sure. He couldn't stop part of his mind from repeating sections of the note back to him... _No doubt you will find this note an unwelcome intrusion into your life'_... _I personally witnessed one of these murders when you and I were but sixteen years old _... _I shall continue my investigation, and as soon as I have proof I shall not hesitate in reporting to the authorities'_... What kind of sadistic person would want to do this to them? He and Sirius had never, in all the years since the murders, given anyone any cause to hate or harm them...  
  
But what if it was the truth? Perhaps this mystery note-writer knew what was going on? Remus knew he wouldn't be able to stand it if Sirius was sent to prison - and there was, as Sirius had said, the probability that Remus would go to prison as well for aiding and abetting a criminal.  
  
And on and on it went for the rest of the day. Every second of free time Remus had was spent dwelling on the same thoughts. He was absolutely frazzled by the time the final bell rang. He dismissed his class with a preoccupied smile, his mind a million miles away. A few of the students gave him concerned looks as they passed his desk, and the last girl to pass paused. Are you okay, Professor?  
  
Quite all right, Edith, Remus assured her.   
  
You're not yourself today, she persisted. Are you sure you didn't have a fight with your lover? Her eyes lingered for a moment on the framed picture of himself and Sirius which sat beside his pot of pens and pencils.  
  
No, everything's fine. Remus stood and walked her to the door. Sorry if I worried you... I suppose I just didn't sleep too well last night. That was an understatement.  
  
Edith smiled shyly and tucked a lock of chestnut hair behind her ear (she was, in fact, one of many students at the school who had a crush on Remus). All right, Professor... I hope you sleep better tonight. Goodbye.  
  
Goodbye, Edith. Remus watched as she walked away, then turned back to his desk. He sighed unhappily and slowly collected his papers. He had a lot of essays to mark, but he suddenly felt very tired. Deciding to bring them home and read them after supper, he tossed the essays into his briefcase and turned off the lights. As he locked the door behind him, the click-click of high heels sounded, announcing the arrival of Minerva McGonagall, head of the English Department.   
  
  
  
He turned. Hello, Minerva. Something wrong?  
  
She frowned. I don't know... but, well - a strange man just showed up at the office, looking for you. I didn't know who he was and he wouldn't give me a name... When I asked if he wanted me to fetch you, he said it wasn't necessary, just asked if I could give this to you. She held out a small, blue envelope.  
  
Er - thanks, Minerva, Remus said uncertainly. He took the envelope and frowned down at it. There was no stamp or return address, only neat writing on the front reading Professor R.J. Lupin-Black'. He stuck it in the front pocket of his blazer, resolving to open it as soon as he got home. But as he climbed into his car, he decided to pay Sirius a visit instead, and see what he thought.  
  
His lover worked in a garage in the heart of London, repairing motorbikes and cars. He was really quite good with mechanical things, a skill Remus blessed - Sirius could fix anything that went wrong at home, even things that Remus had long since given up as hopeless. The professor paused in the doorway, looking for his mate.  
  
Sirius was standing next to a dilapidated-looking car, dressed in coveralls with his hair braided and pinned up out of the way, wiping his hands on a greasy rag and talking to an agitated, overweight man in a business suit. The businessman threw up his hands in what Remus could only imagine to be despair (or perhaps anger), then stomped off towards the counter. Sirius shook his head, looked around, and saw Remus. With a grin, he stuffed the rag into his pocket and came over. Hi, Remmie.  
  
They didn't kiss, because Sirius' co-workers were a little squeamish about such displays.   
  
What's wrong? You look a little peaky.  
  
Er - Remus shrugged. Just... thinking. About last night.  
  
Sirius looked around, slightly nervous. No one was paying the slightest bit of attention to them, but he lowered his voice anyway. Yeah... it's... it's been on my mind, too. But I guess we can't really do anything about it, can we? We'll just have to be more careful from now on. He raised his voice back to normal. What are you planning on for supper, anyway? I was hoping for that fried chicken you make so well - you know, your mum's recipe -  
  
Remus could tell from the look Sirius gave him that the subject of the note was closed for now. I'm on my way home now, so I'll stop by the market and pick up some chicken.  
  
All right. Sirius looked back over his shoulder. The fat businessman had finished his discussion with the counterman and was coming towards them, thunderclouds on his brow. I'll see you at home, then. Love you.  
  
Love you too. Remus smiled up at him. Good luck.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes and went to meet the fat businessman. Remus climbed back into the car and headed for the market. He didn't remember the strange blue envelope until he was standing at the meat counter, waiting his turn. Oh, well. He'd bring it up after supper.  
  
---  
  
I swear, I'll never live to see forty, Sirius grumbled later that night, tucking into his chicken and glazed carrots. I can't believe some people - that stupid bloke you saw today, did you see his car? A complete mess, that. Crashed it head-on into a tree - while he was drunk, I expect - and wants me to fix it for less than five thousand pounds. Honestly... He sighed unhappily. I tell you, some people are so bloody _stupid_!  
  
Remus made a sympathetic noise and dished out more chicken. Rough day, then? I mean, rougher than it was when I arrived?  
  
Ah, I've had worse, Sirius said with a shrug, digging happily into his second helping. How was school?  
  
Fine... I meant to tell you, though - Minerva gave me this. Remus pushed the small envelope across the table. She says some strange bloke wanted to see me, but when she asked him his name, he wouldn't say. What d'you suppose that was all about?  
  
Sirius picked up the envelope and studied it, chewing on carrots. He flipped it over and frowned. Dunno, but if you ask me, it sounds pretty dodgy. Have you opened this yet?  
  
No... I figured I'd run it by you first, Remus said, laying down his fork and taking the envelope back. He started to open it, and hesitated. Do you... do you think it might have anything to do with last night's note?  
  
Who can be sure? Open it and see.  
  
Remus tore open the envelope and drew out a neatly folded piece of paper, the same shade of blue as the envelope. He unfolded it to find more neat script. He read it out loud.  
  
_To Professor R.J. Lupin-Black, Greetings.  
  
I see my note of last night had little, if any, effect on yourself and Mr. Black. I must admit that you have impressed me. I did think you would become rather nervous after hearing what I had to say. I applaud you.  
But still, the matter is of considerable concern. I still cannot let your lover remain at large when he is guilty of such a grievous crime. Though I am suffering a lack of sufficient evidence, do not breathe easy. I am watching you both all the time, and I will catch you the moment either of you steps out of line.  
  
I bid you adieu.  
  
-A Friend'_  
  
There was a long pause after Remus finished reading. Then Sirius dropped his fork with a loud clatter, making his lover jump. He rose from his chair and strode to the window, glaring out into the night. Remus glanced back at the note, rereading it. _I am watching you both all the time'_... was the note-writer watching them now? How could he possibly keep an eye on them both every day, when they worked at two completely different places? Was he just bluffing, to make them scared? Well, he didn't need to try very hard - Remus had been scared since the night before.   
  
Sirius pounded his fist down on the counter. Remus jumped again, his already frayed nerves on edge. Sirius turned to him, and Remus was startled to see tears in his eyes. I mean, dammit! Haven't we been through enough? He sank slowly to the floor beside Remus' chair, resting his head against his husband's knee. Sometimes I think it would be better if we didn't get this far, he muttered. Though he was trying to sound bitter, his voice wavered.   
  
Siri -  
  
If Da had killed me... we wouldn't be going through this. Sirius whispered. I - I dream about him sometimes, you know.  
  
Remus' heart sped up. He and Sirius never discussed their nightmares with each other. Living it had been bad enough, but the way Sirius tossed and turned some nights, moaning or even crying in his sleep, had prompted Remus to try and talk to his lover about it. Sirius flat-out refused to talk about his father, but it looked like that was about to change. Remus kept quiet, knowing an interruption might make Sirius clam up, and stroked Sirius' long hair as his husband talked.  
  
I see him... the way he was t- that night. Not the way he looked after you... h- hurt him... but the way he looked when he saw us in bed together. I- I knew he hated me, but that look was what really drove it home for me. I realised he not only hated me, but would do everything he could to make me either miserable or dead. I've been over it a hundred, a thousand times in my mind, and I can't figure out what went wrong. I really can't. He sniffed. When I was really small... I guess I was four or so, I couldn't have been very old, Regulus wasn't born yet. But anyway... I remember Da picking me up sometimes, and hugging me... he and Mum used to take me for walks, and I'd hold their hands and walk between them... they'd pick me up and swing me.... Da was different then. He was... he was wonderful. But he seemed to change overnight.  
  
Remus ran his fingers through Sirius' hair. How so, my love?  
  
I don't know, Sirius said dully. All of a sudden, he started coming home angry. Then he was just angry all the time. He started hitting us, but I got Mum's share just before and after Regulus was born. I don't know what happened to him.... I wish I did. I wish I knew what had made him the way he was, because maybe then I'd understand him. He closed his eyes. A single tear ran down his cheek, making a small wet spot on Remus' corduroy trousers. He didn't love me anymore. He didn't love any of us anymore...  
  
Oh, Siri. Remus bent to kiss the top of Sirius' head. Don't think about it... it's not worth it... your mother loved you, after all... and Regulus... and I love you. Very much.  
  
Sirius reached up to hug him. I know. But... Remmie... it's not right. A father hating his son enough to try everything and anything possible to destroy him. He _hurt_ you. He hurt you just to see _me_ in pain.  
  
It's okay, darling. It's all over now. It doesn't matter what your father did to you or me or anyone. It's all over. He's dead, he can't hurt anyone ever again. Remus murmured soothingly. You've got to stop blaming yourself for all this. It's not your fault, and it never was. If anything, blame me. Blame me for loving you so much that I can't bear to be apart from you. I know it sounds heartless, but most people would have abandoned you after finding out about your father. But I just couldn't do it... I couldn't leave you there. I brought it all on myself, but it was worth it just to be with you.  
  
Another long silence passed. Sirius let out a shuddery sigh, raising his tearstained face to smile at Remus. You're right, Remmie. You've cared for me more than anything. Being loved by you... makes everything else pale in comparison. Not many people get to be loved the way you love me.  
  
Remus stood, taking Sirius by the hand and helping him to his feet. He leaned up and touched the tip of his nose to Sirius'. Thank you. And you know, not many people have the opportunity to love someone like you. He squeezed Sirius' hand. Come to bed, my love.  
  
---  
  
Across the street, a man lowered his binoculars as the shades of the bedroom window he was watching were closed. He had been watching the proceedings in the kitchen ever since Black had arrived home, and was pleased to see that the notes had caused a bit of an uproar. It had also pleased him to see that the two men had reacted exactly as he had predicted. Their closeness, and his ability to predict their responses, would come in handy later on. He planned to utterly destroy Black, and Black's little lover was an integral part of the plan.  
  
Sweeping his long brown hair out of his eyes, the man lit a cigarette (his one vice) and looked up at the moon. He had his reasons for wanting to destroy Black, mainly because Black had been the destruction of his life twenty years ago. He was determined to put a stop to it all, though. He was going to put a stop to the hell his life had become since then. His fingers wandered absentmindedly to his throat, where he wore an old, golden cross. It was the only reminder he had of that sweet time which had come so suddenly to an end when Black and Lupin met. He touched it, then turned to leave. He smiled to himself. He would give them time to stew in uncertainty, time to reflect over the past and torment themselves with old memories. But not too much time. Soon, very soon, phase two would begin.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
---  
  
(A/N: So, this mystery guy... is he freaking you out yet? Or at least making you curious? Pay attention to him. He will become very important. I promise, you'll learn a lot more about him as we go along, as well.   
  
Most of this chapter was originally written out by hand while I was sitting on the boat. I love the boat. NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE R-RATED! Did you hear me? R-RATED! FanFiction has been running a tight regime lately, and I don't want to get booted off because my story isn't rated high enough. So next chapter, look for this story in the R category! Thanks!)


	3. Shadows

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 3 - Shadows  
  
---  
  
  
  
Remus was in the kitchen, washing the dishes and staring absently out the window, when the call came. He jumped nearly a foot in the air when Sirius' voice sounded behind him, his thoughts crashing back down to Earth. He whirled around, a hand over his heart. Siri! You scared me half to death. What is it?  
  
His lover regarded him with concern.That's what I wanted to talk about. You're never this jumpy. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen you staring off into space like that, either. You've been weird lately. What's wrong?  
  
What was wrong? Didn't he know? For God's sake, they were being watched, followed, - stalked! - by some nutter! That was the problem! It had been an entire week since they had received those notes, and Remus had been getting more and more nervous with every day that passed. All week, he had been getting the strangest feeling that he could sense someone watching him - though when he looked, he never saw anything out of the ordinary.If there really _was_ someone watching them... well, they hadn't given their observer anything of interest, unless he had x-ray vision and could see through their bedroom curtains at night. But nevertheless, it made Remus cringe to think someone might be watching as he showered, cuddled with Sirius, or marked papers. Of course, they weren't entirely sure they _were_ being constantly observed, but it made Remus extremely nervous all the same.  
  
Sirius repeated. Remus realised he had been woolgathering all over again.   
  
He turned away from the sink, withdrawing his hands from the soapy water. I'm just... thinking...  
  
Don't get fussed over it, Sirius said gently, correctly guessing what his husband was thinking about. You know fretting over it is just what this guy wants us to do. He wants to make us uneasy, you know, so maybe we'll slip up, or something like that. You're just acting the way he expects us to. Savvy?  
  
You're right, Remus admitted. But... you know... it's just... weird. I can't help it. You do have to admit this isn't normal. I still think we should go to the police.  
  
I already told you why we can't.  
  
I know.... but I keep getting strange vibes, like someone's following me, or watching me...  
  
Sirius kissed his forehead. Yeah, me too. The other day, I could have sworn someone was tailing me all the way to the Underground station. He tried his best to offer a comforting smile. Just my imagination, I guess.  
  
  
  
I know, I know. Don't be so flippant about it.' Really, it's no big deal, love - just paranoia to the max. We'll be fine. Haven't we always?  
  
I guess...  
  
Good. Listen, I've got to head down to the garage for a little while - Bill says it's an emergency. Don't worry more than you have to, okay?  
  
Remus replied, standing on tiptoe to kiss Sirius softly on the lips. Have fun.... don't be gone long, he added, with a seductive little pout.  
  
I'll go as fast as I can, knowing what I've got waiting at home for me, Sirius breathed, his hands slipping down to cup his lover's buttocks. As a matter of fact.... he lowered his head and kissed Remus' neck, ...I might tell Bill we've got an emergency of our own...  
  
Remus sighed softly in bliss as Sirius kissed his shoulder. As much as I'd love that, darling, I can't let you skip work... the overweight blokes will miss you...  
  
Ha, ha, Sirius said sarcastically, giving his lover a light smack on the bum. See you later, love.  
  
Bye bye, darling. Remus giggled softly and turned back to the dishes. He had only been at it for a few minutes when he heard the distinctive click of the letterbox. He frowned, glancing at the clock. It was too late in the day for regular post. He headed for the front door, wiping his hands on a towel.   
  
His heart began to pound. Lying on the mat was a small blue envelope, identical to the one that had been delivered to him at school. It was addressed simply to the Blacks - which he supposed meant himself and Sirius. (Naturally, seeing as all the other Blacks were in Germany.) With shaking hands, he slit it open. A photograph fell out, fluttering to the floor and landing at his feet, face-down. Remus bent to pick it up.   
  
It was a picture of a wrought-iron fence, surrounded by flowers. It didn't look remotely familiar in the least. Remus frowned, flipping it over, hoping for some sort of comment; but there was nothing written on the photo. He checked the envelope again, drawing out a blue piece of stationary. There was only one sentence written on it.  
  
_Does this look familiar to either of you?'_  
  
No, it didn't look familiar at all. Remus put the stationary and the photo back in the envelope. His mouth felt rather dry for some reason, and he realised he had broken out in goosebumps. The feeling of being watched suddenly increased, almost as if he could feel eyes boring into the back of his head. He put the envelope on the phone table, resolving to show it to Sirius as soon as he returned.   
  
He peered cautiously out the bay window in the parlour, hoping, perhaps, to catch a glimpse of the note-writer. Surely he or she would still be close by? However, there was almost no one in sight, except for old Mrs. Purkiss down the street, who was watering her begonias. Even so, the feeling of being watched refused to lessen. It was paranoid to be thinking this way, he berated himself - but could you really blame him?  
  
---  
  
Sirius arrived home while Remus was down in the cellar, doing laundry. He reached up and took his hair down, pulling out the clips which held it up, unbraiding it and shaking out the silky, ebony mass. He kicked off his boots, his gaze landing on a small blue envelope sitting on the phone table. He picked it up. It was addressed to the Blacks, and it had already been opened - Remus must have gotten it. He pulled out the envelope's contents as his lover emerged from the cellar, carrying a laundry basket full of neatly-folded towels.  
  
That came today, right after you left, Remus said, carrying the basket of towels into the bathroom. I haven't the slightest idea what it's about, but maybe you will.  
  
Sirius shrugged. He looked down at the note. _Does this look familiar to either of you?'_  
  
His gaze switched to the photo and felt as if he had been hit in the stomach with something very heavy. The photo showed a wrought-iron fence, bordered by flowers. In the distance, he could just make out what appeared to be a child's swing set. He _knew_ that place. He realised he was holding his breath, and let it out with a whoosh, sinking onto the sofa with trembling legs. Remus emerged from the bathroom, carrying the empty laundry basket. Love, what's wrong?  
  
Sirius looked up at his lover, feeling curiously weak. Did - did you see this? He held up the photo. Do you know what this _is _?  
  
No, do you?  
  
He swallowed. This is - this is where I killed Williams.  
  
Remus' eyes widened; he seized the picture. He gulped. Where is it?  
  
The park. Over by the children's swings. Remember, they found his body right outside the park?  
  
Remus plopped down on the arm of the sofa as the strength went out of his legs. Are you sure?  
  
Of course I am. I'm the one who did it, remember? Sirius snapped.   
  
I know, I just -  
  
Forgot? Lucky you. I suppose it's easy for you to forget every now and then, right? Sirius' voice was growing waspish.   
  
Siri, you know I feel just as horrible about it as you do -  
  
If you feel so horrible, how come it's so easy to forget what I did? Sirius shouted. For God's sake, I'm a murderer, Remus -  
  
I couldn't forget it if I tried! Remus shouted back. Siri, do you honestly think I'd be able to forget something like that - he lowered his voice. I love you, no matter what you've done. You know I do.  
  
Sirius put his face in his hands. he muttered, his voice muffled. It's just... you know. Makes me feel ruddy terrible every time I'm reminded of it. Maybe you're in love with a murderer, but I _am_ the murderer, and I don't think I have to tell you which one is more of a guilt trip.  
  
The brunette put his arms around his lover's neck. I'm sorry, too.  
  
There's no need for you to be.  
  
I'm sorry anyway. Remus rested his cheek against the top of Sirius' head. I know this isn't easy for you.  
  
Sirius sighed. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. You're doing your best to make me feel better. It's just a shock, you understand? To see that place again after... well...  
  
His lover kissed his forehead. I understand... when you told me what it was... I mean, I didn't even recognize the park before you said it... he frowned. This is what you meant... isn't it? This morning? This person... whoever it is... he wants us to get mad at each other, doesn't he? He wants us to... I don't know... stop trusting each other?  
  
Who knows. Sirius' arms wound slowly around Remus' waist. But I do know this means he definitely knows what's going on. He kissed Remus' throat. I don't know what we're going to to, though... well... about the notes. But... I can think of what to do with _you..._  
  
With _me _? Remus really didn't think this was the appropriate time for seduction, given the circumstances; but he wasn't about to complain as Sirius ran a hand along his thigh. Besides, he'd had enough of this depressing train of thought to last a lifetime; any distraction was more than welcome. He plucked the envelope and its contents from his lover's fingers, tossing them aside onto the coffee table. Why, whatever can you mean, Sirius Black?   
  
I'll show you what I mean. Sirius stood, Remus in his arms, and began climbing the stairs to their bedroom, placing kisses along his lover's neck as he went. I'll show you pleasure better than anything ever felt in Heaven or Hell.  
  
I like the way that sounds, Remus breathed, as Sirius kicked the bedroom door shut behind him and lowered him onto the bed.  
  
---  
  
The next day was Sunday, Remus' day to rise early and take a walk while Sirius had a lie-in. He dressed quickly in one of Sirius' old t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants, then brushed Sirius' hair aside and leaned down to kiss his cheek.  
  
'Ave fun, Sirius mumbled into his pillow, still three-quarters asleep. Love you.  
  
Love you, too. Remus slipped out of the bedroom, closing the door silently behind him. He pulled on his running shoes and locked the door behind him before heading off. He really loved these Sunday morning walks; the streets were still and silent except for a small trickle of people heading to church. He did wish Sirius would come with him every once and awhile, but after a long week at the garage his husband deserved to sleep late.   
  
He stopped to peek at the selection in the front window of an antiques shop. He really liked buying old pieces; he also liked buying beat-up furniture at bazaars and fixing them up for the house. He had completely refurbished a Welsh dresser year before last which now held pride-of-place in the dining room, flanked by a pair of jade dragons he had rescued from a bin on trash day. It had become quite a conversation piece with guests.   
  
As he admired an old screen decorated with cranes, he heard footsteps behind him. He turned to see a man around his age standing there. He reminded Remus of Sirius when he was young - probably because of his shoulder-length hair and the cigarette in between his lips. He had dark green, mysterious eyes that were somehow almost hypnotic - another way he reminded Remus of his lover. Good morning.  
  
Good morning. The man dropped his cigarette and ground it out under the toe of one boot. You like antiques, yes?  
  
Very much, Remus answered, relived to find the man wasn't a mugger or a murdering psycho. Are you the owner of this shop?  
  
No, I just like to browse. I don't live too far from here. Are you headed for church?  
  
Oh, no, Remus said with a laugh. Not dressed like this, anyway. I'm just out for a walk.  
  
The man's gaze had switched to the wedding ring on Remus' left hand, which glimmered in the early-morning light. Where's your husband, then?  
  
He's - wait a moment. Remus frowned, puzzled. How did you -  
  
It happened so fast he barely realised what was going on. The man suddenly grabbed him tight-tight around the waist, pulling Remus against him. Something hard and cold poked against Remus' ribs. A gun? Don't make a noise, the man hissed in his ear. Just come with me.  
  
No - Remus struggled against the man's painfully tight grasp. Let me go-  
  
A fist drove itself into his stomach, hard. Remus gasped, suddenly unable to breathe. He collapsed. The man caught him, hefting him up onto his shoulder in a fireman's carry. He cast a quick glance around, checking for onlookers, but the streets were deserted. The houses were likewise still and silent - their occupants were either at church or still asleep. The man hurried off down the street, where a van was parked. He quickly shut Remus into the back of the van, then clambered into the driver's seat. Another fast look around assured him that he was quite unobserved. He started the van up and pulled away from the curb, speeding off down the road and eventually joining the traffic thronging the motorway. Remus moaned softly in the back, but remained unconscious.  
  
---  
  
It was nearly ten when Sirius got out of bed. He yawned and stretched, tossing his hair back. Where was Remus? Usually he was back by now, to prod his lover out of bed. Maybe he had stumbled upon one of those Sunday morning auctions or estate sales. They weren't rich, but they weren't badly off, either, and Remus loved to splurge on new-old books and odd knickknacks for the house. But he never took his wallet with him on his walks, in fear of muggers... ah, well. Sirius decided to wait and see if Remus showed up a little later. There were plenty of things out there that were bound to distract his lover. It wasn't anything to get fussed about. Sirius trudged into the kitchen and began to make breakfast.  
  
But an hour later, Remus still hadn't returned, and Sirius was very worried. It wasn't normal for Remus to be out for this long without calling, and he certainly never went on five-hour walks. Picking sullenly at his scrambled eggs (which were steadily growing colder and more rubbery every minute), Sirius wondered if perhaps Remus hadn't left on purpose... maybe he didn't _want_ to come back... Sirius didn't blame him, it must be torture to know your lover was a bloody murderer...  
  
No, that was silly. Remus loved him, and Sirius knew that as well as he knew his own name. Besides, he hadn't taken anything with him. Maybe he had gotten hurt? Sirius bit his lip at the thought. Was Remus lying hurt in the road somewhere, bleeding to death? No, surely not. Remus walked along well-travelled roads; if he was hurt, someone would have found him and brought him to a hospital...  
  
But (no pun intended), he seriously couldn't stand it anymore. Abandoning his rubbery eggs, Sirius jumped up from the table and snagged his car keys. He'd start driving along Remus' usual route - maybe he'd find his lover sitting on a bench somewhere, immersed in a book or in conversation with a student...  
  
But none of that was necessary. As soon as Sirius set foot in the hall, the letterbox clanked and a blue envelope drifted to the floor. Sirius bounded to the door and yanked it open, hoping to catch the person who kept delivering the damned things - but there was no one in sight. Frustrated, Sirius slammed the door and bent to pick up the envelope.  
  
There was only one thing inside. It was a photograph of Remus, apparently unconscious, lying on an old, stained mattress. Sirius stared at it in horror for a few moments, unable to tear his eyes from the trickle of blood at the corner of his lover's mouth. Remus was bound at the wrists and ankles with thick, scratchy-looking rope.  
  
Finally, Sirius tore his gaze away from this terrible scene, flipping the photo over with shaking, numb fingers.  
  
_The stage is set. The players are ready. Now, Mr. Black - let the show begin.'_  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
---  
  
(A/N: Written while I was at the beach. I hate the beach. Everything got full of sand, and my feet have patches of sunburn on the top where I missed them with the lotion. The seagulls attacked me when I was eating my french fries. But I still managed to write this chapter (by hand) before my mother finally said it was time to go. I know it's not really R-rated, but just to be safe.... stay tuned for chapter 4!)


	4. Searching

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 4 - Searching  
  
---  
  
When Remus awoke, it was to find himself sprawled out on an old mattress. He ached all over, as if he had been beaten, and his head had an unpleasant muzzy, dazed feeling. He had trouble sitting up, and when he reached up to push his sweaty bangs out of his eyes, he realised his wrists were bound. They, too, ached, but this was because the prickly rope binding them was digging painfully into his flesh. He tried to cry out, but all that escaped his lips was a feeble, thin moan. His lips and throat felt dry, parched. He wondered how long he had been - well, wherever he was. How had he gotten here? He couldn't remember. He closed his eyes wearily. Had he been drugged? Forcing his heavy lids apart once more, he looked down at his arms. Faint marks marred the pale skin, and if he slid himself a little to the side - the sleeve of his t-shirt pulled up enough for him to see clumsily applied band-aids on his arm, surrounded by bruises.   
  
He shut his eyes once more. He had obviously been drugged, so there was no telling how long he had been here. But what Remus did know was that someone was holding him prisoner. But who? Why? He and Sirius didn't make enough money to warrant a ransom, and Remus was positive there wasn't a kidnapper out there who took people based solely on their knowledge of British literature. Unless - a shock went through him as the idea hit - unless it was the person who had been sending all those notes. His heart began to race. There was no other possibility. Was he going to be killed? Or was the person going to threaten him until he decided to betray Sirius' conscience? No, he would never do that! He would take the knowledge to the grave, no matter what anyone said or did to him. He would never sell his lover out like that.  
  
A door creaked open and footsteps sounded. Remus could barely muster the strength required to raise his eyelids. A strong hand was placed behind his neck, and a blessedly cool glass of water was placed to his lips. Deep green eyes sparkled down at him. The glass was pulled away after Remus had only taken a few small sips. He whimpered.  
  
No, no. You have to go slow, or you'll vomit.   
  
The glass was returned, and Remus took a few more grateful sips. It went this way until Remus had finished the whole glass, then a damp cloth dabbed at his forehead. The voice spoke again, gently.  
  
Go back to sleep. I'll bring something to eat in a little while.   
  
The professor was more than grateful for the chance to lie down again, as he still felt dizzy. As he closed his eyes, he felt a sharp prick in the crook of his elbow. Almost immediately, he began to feel pleasantly drowsy. The footsteps faded away, the door shutting quietly behind them. A fleeting thought of Sirius crossed Remus' mind as he drifted off, but whatever he had been injected with was working quickly within him now, and his lover faded into insignificance as he lost consciousness.  
  
---  
  
Remus had been held captive for several days, though he didn't know it. He also didn't know that Sirius was frantic with worry, and had been searching for him since Sunday afternoon. Minerva McGonagall was unpleasantly surprised on Monday morning when she returned to school to find Sirius outside her office door, smoking a cigarette. He looked like hell, his usually neat hair pulled back into a messy ponytail, his eyes bloodshot and tired-looking. He was dressed in a pair of jeans with monstrous rips in the knees and a t-shirt with a large grease stain on it, as if he had simply put on whatever had been lying under the bed when he got up that morning. Though, judging by his look, he hadn't gotten any sleep at all. Minerva had never quite liked Remus' lover; she wondered how such a refined, intelligent man as Remus could have ended up with someone as boorish as Sirius, who cared nothing for what went on at the university. But she forced her face into a smile.  
  
Mr. Black. How nice to see you. I-  
  
Have you seen Remus? Sirius cut her off abruptly.   
  
Minerva was taken aback. Why, no. I've been away all weekend, visiting a niece in Canterbury. Why, is something the matter?  
  
He went for his walk Sunday morning like always, Sirius said tensely. But he didn't come back.  
  
Minerva gasped, putting a hand over her mouth. Goodness! And you haven't heard from him at all?  
  
No. I was hoping you'd seen him.  
  
Have you tried with his family? Doesn't he have relatives in France?  
  
I've tried everyone, even my own relatives in Germany. None of them have seen or heard from him. I didn't want to get them too worried, when I called he had only been gone for a few hours and I thought I was probably overreacting. But Remus _never_ stays away overnight without telling me, and he didn't come back while I was asleep. He snorted and took a drag on his cigarette. To tell the truth, I didn't sleep at all last night. I was too worried about him.  
  
It was obvious that he had gotten no sleep, but Minerva was far too polite to say so. She also wondered when he had started smoking again; Remus had told her once that Sirius had smoked when he was younger, but had dropped the habit not long after they moved in together. As if in response to her unasked question, Sirius reached over and ground out the cigarette in the ashtray beside the door. Look at me. I'm so damned worried that I'm smoking. It's been my first cigarette in almost eighteen years. God - I just - he cut himself off. Never mind. You've got classes. Just... if you see Remus, tell him I'm worried sick, please?  
  
Minerva felt a pang of sympathy and sorrow for him. He wasn't exactly country-club material, but he genuinely loved Remus. She couldn't even begin to imagine what kind of hell he was going through. Yes, of course.  
  
Thank you. He turned and strode off down the hall, head down and hands in his pockets, the very picture of misery. Minerva bit her lip. She'd have to go find someone to substitute for Remus' classes while he was gone...  
  
Sirius had just reached the doors when he heard footsteps pounding behind him, and a breathless female voice rang out. Mr. Black! Mr. Black, please wait!  
  
He turned. A young girl with long chestnut hair hurried up to him, clutching her books to her chest. Pleading brown eyes met his. Excuse me... but I thought I heard you and Professor McGonagall talking about Professor Lupin-Black, she said timidly. I - I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I was just walking by and I... overheard what you were saying. She looked down at her feet. I'm sorry.  
  
No need to be, Miss -?  
  
Grey. Edith Grey. She paused, then blurted on - Is Professor Lupin-Black all right?  
  
The man turned away, but not before Edith saw the fear and worry in his eyes. I - I really don't know, Miss Grey. I pray to God he is. Goodbye. He slipped out the doors, leaving Edith to watch him through the glass as he strode off in the direction of the student parking lot. She raised a long fingernail to her mouth and nibbled at it, ignoring the chips which appeared in her turquoise nail varnish.   
  
---  
  
By Wednesday, Sirius was more frantic than ever. He had spent the last two and a half days calling everyone he could possibly think of, to ask if they had seen his husband. He had taken a vacation from the garage, telling Bill he couldn't possibly concentrate on work at a time like this. Bill, whose daughter had run away once, knew the stress of losing a loved one and allowed Sirius to take time off, wishing him luck. But by the middle of the week, Sirius was exhausted. He hadn't slept more than four hours in the past three days, had only eaten one small bowl of cereal since Sunday night, and spent most of his time on the phone. Between calls, he sat and smoked, downing mug after mug of strong black coffee.  
  
The time had come to go to the police. Remus had been away longer than the twenty-four-hour period required to qualify as a missing person. Sirius did his best to clean himself up and look halfway decent, then gathered up his cigarettes and a few recent photographs of Remus and headed for the police station.  
  
He received a slight surprise when he was taken to a detective - the detective was none other than one of the officers who had questioned him about Williams' murder twenty years ago. He and Remus had referred to this officer as Sideburns, but now the sideburns were gone, as well as quite a lot of hair from the top of his head. The block on his desk read Detective Burns'. Well, they had been close.  
  
Burns obviously remembered Sirius; he leaned across the desk to shake hands as Sirius dropped into the visitors' chair. Mr. Black. What's the trouble?  
  
It's Remus. My - my lover. He's missing.  
  
Burns reached for a form and a pen. How long has he been gone?  
  
Since Sunday morning. He usually wakes up early and goes for a walk, but he never came back.  
  
Did you two quarrel?  
  
No! Not at all. I was asleep when he left, but we hadn't argued the night before or anything. He just... never came back.  
  
Burns raised an eyebrow. I see. And you've waited this long to seek help?  
  
Sirius shook his head. It's not like that. May I smoke in here?  
  
The detective waved his permission, and Sirius lit a fag. It's not like I haven't been doing anything, he muttered. I've been calling everyone we know, going through the address book number by number. I've tried every relative we have here in England, and the ones in Germany and France. I've asked his colleagues at school. I've gone up and down the streets he likes to walk again and again, asking people if they saw him come by Sunday morning. No one's seen him. It's like he vanished into thin air.  
  
Do you have any enemies?  
  
Sirius' hand shook slightly, the tip of the cigarette wavering. N-no. No one who would do anything like this. I mean, we've had disagreements with people, but never anything major, and none of them would probably remember Remus after the moment's past...  
  
Burns studied him critically. His police sense was telling him Black wasn't being completely honest, but he let it slide. I'll need a complete physical description, and any photographs you may have.  
  
Sirius put a trembling hand into the breast pocket of his flannel shirt and drew out the photos he had brought from home. He handed them to Burns, unable to keep the tremor out of his voice. Please... please find him. I - I can't - I love him, I couldn't bear it if he was... if something happened to him...  
  
---  
  
Wake up, darling.  
  
Remus opened his eyes. The warm voice sounded familiar, and his heart leapt - perhaps Sirius had come to fetch him? Perhaps everything had been an insane nightmare?   
  
His excitement died almost instantly. Someone was sitting on the edge of his mattress, but it was not Sirius. It was a tall, slender man with shoulder-length brown hair and dark green eyes. A gold cross glinted on a chain around his neck, and a cigarette was in his left hand. Remus blinked slowly, taking in the man's appearance, then looked down. The band-aids on his arms had been replaced by clean, cloth bandages, but the bruising was still visible at the edges. He wondered what he had been given, and panic wormed its way through his sleepy state.  
  
Who - where -?  
  
The brown-haired man reached out and brushed Remus' tousled hair out of his eyes. It's not time for talk. He ground out his cigarette and stood. His hands went to his waist, unbuckling his belt and sliding his trousers off. Remus watched with slowly dawning alarm, realising what this man planned on doing. He tried desperately to get up, but his wrists and ankles were still tightly bound. His head swam and he stopped moving. Tears welled in his eyes as the man knelt beside him, pulling his clothes off.   
  
No, please - don't... please, no -  
  
Didn't I tell you it wasn't time for talk? the man said mildly. Hush, now, my love.  
  
I don't want it - Remus struggled in vain to get away. The man merely grabbed him by his bonds and held him down. His fingers wound through Remus' hair, clenching painfully and pulling Remus' head back so far it was if he planned to slit his throat. His voice sounded in Remus' ear, breathless and excited.  
  
You can be nice, can't you? Black's gotten you broken in very well, hasn't he? Groggy and faint from the drugs still coursing through his system, Remus didn't have the strength to resist as the man's other hand moved between his thighs, forcing his legs apart. I always had my doubts that that man could do _anything_ right, but maybe I'll be surprised.  
  
Tears wet the mattress as Remus squeezed his eyes shut, trying one last attempt to stop his tormentor. Please don't hurt me.... please... I don't want you inside me -  
  
Sorry, love, but it's too late to turn back now, the man whispered, lowering himself down on top of his captive.  
  
---  
  
It was almost two hours before it was finally over, and Remus could do nothing but weep as his rapist got up and dressed. The pain, shame, and guilt were enormous, a heavy burden on Remus' shoulders. What would Sirius do when he found out? Surely he'd be furious, but most likely his rage would be directed at his lover. Remus had allowed another man to have him, hadn't even tried to resist. He wished he had fought back harder, refusing to admit that the drugs had prevented him from doing so. If the man had... had given him a disease, or something - the tears flowed harder. What was he going to do?   
  
He flinched when the man brushed his sweaty hair out of his eyes. Don't touch me, he whispered, trying to sound fierce. All that came out was a pitiful, scared plea, and the man smiled down at him.   
  
Now, now. No need to be rude. Stop your crying and smile. You want to look nice for your photo shoot, don't you?  
  
P-photo shoot? Remus asked faintly.   
  
The man got to his feet and rummaged around in the drawers of a nearby wardrobe. He drew out a camera and smiled. Of course. Don't you think your dear, sweet Sirius needs to know about this?   
  
Panic rose within Remus, threatening to choke him. No, don't!  
  
What do you think he'll say when he sees these pictures? his rapist asked sweetly, raising the camera. Remus winced as the flash went off. What do you think he'll do when he sees what his so-called faithful lover has been up to? Whoring himself out to a complete stranger? Why, he'll be furious. I'd be amazed if he even wants to see your face again after this.  
  
Remus burst into tears once more, the words cutting deep, even through the humiliation he felt. This man, this foul, wretched, twisted man, was voicing the very thing that Remus was afraid of. He was right - Sirius would never want to touch his lover after he had been violated like this. His body shook with his sobbing, and he didn't even notice as the man silently left the room, closing the door behind him.   
  
The man smiled secretly to himself as he headed for his basement, which was equipped with his own personal darkroom. He was a photographer, and he always developed his own pictures. Though, if he hadn't been a professional, a private darkroom would have been necessary to develop the pictures he had been taking recently. As he stood in the darkroom, dipping the photos into their trays of liquid, the nasty smile on his lips spread. How will Black react? He'll be destroyed. Utterly destroyed. And infuriated. Hopefully this will add fire to his search.  
  
---  
  
Friday morning marked the fifth full day of Remus' disappearance. Sirius woke up around noon, feeling decidedly groggy. He had forced himself to take sleeping pills the night before, a practise he usually loathed, but he wasn't going to be very helpful towards finding Remus if he didn't get any rest. He trudged to the bathroom and turned on the shower. He stood motionless under the spray for a long time, his face in his hands. He probably would have stayed there for hours, except the hot water ran out. He washed up quickly, shivering in the cold water, then hopped out and wrapped a towel around his waist.  
  
He looked at himself in the mirror. He still looked wretched despite the shower and sleep, and peaky from not eating properly for the past week. He leaned forward and rested his forehead on the mirror. A long sigh escaped him. The police had had absolutely no luck in trying to locate Remus. Granted, they had been searching for only two days, but you'd think with so many people asking questions that _someone_ would remember _something_. He made no effort to brush away the strands of wet hair that fell over his shoulders, still shivering as a cool breeze from the open window met his wet skin.   
  
Sirius closed his eyes. He could understand now what it felt like to have your world suddenly fall apart in a manner of seconds. What it was like to lose someone you loved so dearly that you'd give your life for that person... tears threatened, stinging his eyelids, and he straightened up, brushing them away angrily. Crying wasn't going to help at all. He reached for the comb and the hair dryer. All he could do was to get out there and start asking around, for what felt like the billionth time, hoping against hope that someone would remember seeing Remus on Sunday morning.   
  
After drying off and getting dressed, he headed downstairs for breakfast. He didn't feel much like eating, but it also wouldn't help to be passing out from hunger in the middle of the search. A pile of mail lay at the foot of the stairs, and Sirius bent to scoop it up. Nothing much. A few bills, advertisements from the local garden shop, a catalogue, and - a blue envelope.  
  
The rest of the post fluttered to the floor as Sirius gaped at the envelope. He ripped it open, noticing it was rather thicker than usual. A slew of coloured photographs fell out, along with a single sheet of blue stationary. There was a short message scrawled on it: _He was wonderful. You trained him well, Black.'_  
  
His mouth suddenly dry, Sirius turned his attention to the photographs. His stomach plummeted. The first was a photo of Remus, lying on that same stained mattress. He was naked and tied up, tears running down his cheeks. Bandages were wrapped around his arms, and there was blood on his thighs. Sirius bit his lip hard enough to make it bleed, slumping down to sit on the first stair. The other photographs were of Remus, too, from different angles and directions. Sirius' eyes grew wider and wider as he went through the pictures and saw what had been done to his lover. _He was wonderful. You trained him well, Black.'_ He hadn't just been raped. He had been _tortured_.  
  
The photographs slipped from Sirius' fingers and landed in a terrible spread at his feet as the raven-haired man lowered his face into his hands and began to sob.   
  
---  
  
Remus lay as still as possible, shivering. He was still naked, and he was very cold. He actually wished that horrible man would return, just so he could ask for a blanket or something. His tears had long since dried up, but he still let out a hitching, watery whimper every now and then. Shame burned in him, aching worse than his injuries. How could he have let this happen? Where had he gone wrong? He shouldn't have trusted the man outside the antiques shop. It was the same man who had kidnapped and raped him, Remus knew, and he cursed himself for bringing it down on himself. He wished he had a little bit of Sirius' cynicism and mistrust. The thought of his lover made Remus cringe. He hadn't the slightest idea how he was going to explain all this when he got home. _If_ he got home, that was.   
  
The door creaked open. Remus looked up, trembling. His captor was back, dressed in a pair of flannel pajamas. However, he was carrying a pile of blankets and what looked like a mug of hot tea. Remus could have wept in relief, but he was terribly afraid the man would hurt him again.  
  
Don't be scared, darling. The hand that caressed Remus' cheek was gentle, but he flinched from it. The man pulled a pocketknife from between the pile of blankets, and slit the ropes binding Remus' wrists and ankles. Deep, angry red weals were left from where the ropes had dug into his skin, but it was good to be untied. Remus rubbed his wrists as the man unfolded a pair of pajamas. He helped Remus into them, then wrapped him in the blankets and pressed the mug of tea into Remus' hands. He was so weak that he could barely keep a hold on it, tea dripping onto the mattress as he raised the mug to his lips with trembling hands.   
  
Finally he summoned the strength and courage to speak up. Who... who are you?  
  
The man chuckled. Why, Remus! Don't you recognize me?  
  
Remus shook his head. Sorry, but no.  
  
The man ran a hand through his long hair. I'm Peasegood. Nigel Peasegood. And at the sound of the name, Remus remembered him - Nigel Peasegood had been one of Williams' friends when they were all at at school together. His hands shook a little more violently, and tea dribbled down his front. Nigel dabbed at it with a napkin. Do you remember me now?  
  
A barely audible whisper.   
  
Nigel took the empty mug from Remus. Now lie down. He laughed at the panicked look on Remus' face. Would I really take the trouble to get you undressed and have you again after I've just made you warm and comfy? No, it's time for sleep.  
  
Never taking his eyes off the other man, Remus laid down. Nigel pulled something out of his pocket - a syringe tipped with a long needle, filled with a clear liquid. Remus gasped and tried to pull his arm out of harm's way, but it was no use. Nigel was a lot bigger and stronger than he was, even if he hadn't been woozy from drugs and nearly unable to move after being so viciously hurt. The bandages were unwound and the needle pierced his skin. With unease, Remus realized the track marks were more visible than they had been the first time he had noticed them. He lay quite still as his arm was rebandaged, beginning to drift on the drug. What was he being given? Morphine, perhaps?  
  
Nigel kissed his cheek. Goodnight, my dear. Oh, but first - Metal clanked, and Remus' arm was jerked rudely. He opened his eyes to find he was handcuffed to the radiator beside his mattress.   
  
Can't have you getting away, can we? Nigel breathed in his ear, before getting up and leaving the room. The very last thing he did was to click off the light, leaving Remus alone in the dark.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
---  
  
(A/N: This guy, Nigel. He's brutal, isn't he? I feel so bad for Remus. And Sirius, too. The end of this chapter reminds me of a book by Stephen King, called Gerald's Game'. In it, a woman was handcuffed to the bed, but her husband had a heart attack and died before he could let her out of the cuffs. Since she was all alone at their vacation house in the woods of Maine, she had no one to help her and ended up spending days there. I won't tell you how she escaped, because it was quite gruesome. I don't recommend that book unless you have a strong stomach.  
  
On a lighter note, I am the proud owner of a Sirius Black t-shirt! It has Sirius' wanted poster from the PoA movie on the front. I'm not a fan of Gary Oldman and I really don't think he looked ANYTHING like Sirius should, but how could I resist a shirt paying homage to one of my two favourite HP characters? I really would have loved a shirt with Sirius AND Remus on it, but no luck. The people who make PoA merchandise always seem to forget Remus, anyway. I wanted his and Sirius' action figures, but it was $7.99 a set and I'd end up with two Harrys. Sigh.)


	5. Torment

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 5 - Torment  
  
---  
  
It was nearly midnight.  
  
Sirius hadn't moved an inch in the past twelve hours, even though the phone had rung several times and someone had knocked at the front door for nearly twenty minutes before giving up. He was curled up on his bed in a tight little ball and refused to get up for anything, though by now he was quite hungry and thirsty and needed to pee very badly. He barely noticed. Inside, he ached with worry and fear and anger; those horrible photographs were firmly implanted in his mind. But most of all, he was ashamed. Ashamed that his lover was in danger, being hurt and raped, and he could do nothing about it. A hard lump rose in his throat, and he whimpered. If he had the slightest idea of where Remus could be, he wouldn't have been lying on the bed, doing nothing. If he knew where Remus was, he would be beating the living daylights out of the bastard who had taken him right now.  
  
There was the matter of the photos, of course. The right thing to do would be to take them to the police and have them analyzed for fingerprints and such. But Sirius loathed the very thought of showing those pictures of his lover, beaten and naked and shamed, to the police. It was degrading, the way Remus had been treated, and Sirius didn't want anyone else to see. If only... if only there was some _clue_ in the photos that could point to Remus' location.... Why had Remus been kidnapped in the first place? Would the kidnapper keep him alive, or would he hear Remus was being searched for, grow scared, and kill Sirius' lover before he could be found? What did the kidnapper want? Detective Burns had told Sirius that not getting a ransom demand from the kidnapper by now was an ominous turn indeed.  
  
If we don't get a ransom request in the next few days, it won't be a question of whether Remus is alive or not. It'll just be a question of where the kidnapper has hidden his body.  
  
Sirius swallowed, finally sitting up, his arms and legs prickling with pins and needles. He reached over to the nightstand and fumbled a cigarette out of the pack, lighting it and taking a long drag of warm, comforting tobacco smoke. He got up and lumbered off to the bathroom, his mind going a mile a minute. He was not going to let Remus die. He was going to find him, no matter what, before that happened. And he was going to start right this minute.  
  
After relieving himself he returned to the bedroom and dug in the wardrobe, pulling out a pair of tight black jeans, a black t-shirt, and his old trenchcoat. He pulled on the lot, brushing his long hair back into a ponytail. Grabbing his cigarettes and lighter, he shoved them into his pocket along with a picture of himself and Remus, seized frame and all from the mantle. He locked the door behind him and took a deep breath, looking out at the moonlit streets. His feet carried him automatically down the usual route Remus walked on Sundays, his dark eyes flickering back and forth as he looked around for any kind of previously unnoticed clue.  
  
And there was one - an antiques shop. Sirius knew Remus' fondness for such shops quite well, and he turned his attention to this one. It was open; warm light slanted onto the pavement from its windows and an old man was inside, puttering around a shelf of decrepit books while a young woman in a green dress studied a selection of old dolls. Sirius flicked his cigarette butt away and pushed open the door.  
  
The old man turned with a bright smile when the bells over the door tinkled; but his smile faltered when he saw who had entered - a young man dressed entirely in black, who looked like he hadn't gotten much sleep as of late. But the old man tried to be polite.  
  
Good evening, sir, how may I -  
  
I want to ask if you've seen someone. Sirius pulled the framed photo of himself and Remus out of his pocket and handed it to the shopkeep. It was a photo taken by Remus' mother when the whole family had gone to Majorca last summer, and Sirius willed himself not to cry as memories of that sweet time rose in his mind. Instead he focused on the little old man, who was studying the photo carefully.  
  
Sorry, lad. I haven't seen him, he said at last, handing the picture back to Sirius.  
  
Well, what about last Sunday morning, around nine? Sirius asked desperately. That's when he disappeared - maybe he stopped by to browse, he loves stuff like this -  
  
No, not at all, the little man said sadly, shaking his head. I don't open until ten or so on Sundays... I'm very sorry.  
  
Thanks anyway, Sirius said glumly, turning to leave. A hand rested on his arm before he could take more than two steps.  
  
Excuse me. It was the young woman in the green dress. She was looking at Sirius in some concern. You said you're looking for someone? I live right across the way, and I was home Sunday. I happened to glance out the window and saw two men about your age outside this shop, chatting. When I looked up the next time, they were gone, but a van was pulling away from the curb.  
  
Sirius' heart leapt. He held out the framed picture. Was he one of them? he asked eagerly, tapping Remus with a fingernail.  
  
The young woman studied the picture. she said finally. I'm pretty sure it was him. He was with a man with long brown hair.  
  
And the van? Sirius asked quickly. What about that?  
  
I didn't see him inside, just the long-haired man. But it was a dark blue van. I don't remember the license number... she bit her lip. I'm afraid I can't be much of a help.  
  
No, no, it's perfectly all right, Sirius reassured her. You're the first person in a week who's seen anything - Impulsively, he kissed her cheek. She turned bright red, a shy smile spreading across her face.  
  
Good luck, she said. He winked at her and headed out the door, pausing outside to light a cigarette. It wasn't a lot of information, and the police would probably have dismissed it as totally unhelpful. But Sirius felt he had to be optimistic about his search. And at least the girl had _seen_ Remus, and recognized him, meaning he hadn't just fallen off the face of the earth - as Sirius occasionally wondered if he had. But a stranger, a mysterious van... along with the photographs, it proved Remus had been kidnapped. And Sirius would bet his life on the probability that this long-haired stranger in the van had been the one who had kidnapped and raped Remus.  
  
His fists clenched in fury, but then he sighed, sending a long stream of cigarette smoke into the air. There was no use getting angry now. Not until he found the worthless son of a bitch who had tormented his lover and made him pay. But there would be no killing, he vowed. As much as he hated this unknown person, he was determined, no matter what, not to kill him. He had already killed twice for Remus' sake; but he would not do it any more. The murders in the past had tormented them throughout the years, bringing severe depression down upon them - but mostly Sirius himself. He would not stain his hands with any more blood. Though, after seeing what had happened to Remus, Sirius had to admit he'd be hard-put to keep his temper under control....  
  
He sighed again. This was no time to be plotting revenge. It was time to do a little more research - hopefully he'd have something useful to tell the police in the morning.  
  
---  
  
  
  
Remus stirred, his eyes opening slowly. His right arm was asleep, completely numb. He sat up, swaying slightly and feeling very woozy, forcing his arm to move. It prickled with pins and needles, but Remus had more important things to think about.  
  
It was time to face facts. He was being held prisoner by a man who was possibly mad, almost certainly unbalanced; a man who wasn't averse to using drugs, restraint, and threats to keep him in his place. Sirius must be frantic, and had likely contacted the police by now, though Remus still had no real idea of how long he had been gone. The drugs Nigel was using on him were probably dangerous, and illegal, as well. He couldn't stay here, at the mercy of an unpredictable sadist. He had to do _something_.  
  
But what? Gazing helplessly around the room, which was bare except for his mattress, the radiator, and an old wardrobe, Remus had to admit that it seemed nearly impossible. But he would wait, and watch. All things were possible, but you just had to figure out how to make them happen. It wouldn't be easy, if Nigel kept drugging him. It was hard enough for Remus to keep his eyes open at the moment, let alone scour the room for clues. Somehow, he had to figure out how to keep Nigel from drugging him...  
  
As if the thought of his name had summoned him, the door creaked open that moment and Nigel entered, carrying a steaming cup of soup. He looked pleased to see Remus sitting up. Ah, you're awake. I expected you to sleep through the whole day, my love.  
  
Don't call me that, Remus said sharply. Nigel looked slightly taken aback as he sat on the edge of the mattress.  
  
Whyever not?  
  
I'm not your love, Remus whispered.  
  
Then why did you let me take you the other night? Nigel said sweetly, raising a spoonful of soup to his lips and blowing on it. Why didn't you fight back, kick, scream? I never tried to restrain you, and yet you barely resisted. He held the spoon out to Remus, who turned his head away. Unless you _wanted_ me? Perhaps your token resistance was just a show, when in fact you wanted me? His dark green eyes were suddenly darker. He set the cup of soup aside and moved closer to Remus, forcing him to lie down.  
  
You're a liar - Remus gasped, trying and failing to squirm out from underneath his captor. Dammit! If only he could get out of this handcuff...  
  
Nigel kissed the side of his neck. Still trying to put on a show. There's no need. Your darling Sirius is not here. He can't see or hear us.  
  
Remus recoiled. I don't care if he is or if he isn't! I don't want you!  
  
Nigel's hand met his cheek with a sharp smack. Remus gasped, his uncuffed hand going to his stinging cheek. Nigel's eyes were suddenly narrowed and dangerous - in fact, he wore a look similar to the one Remus remembered Sirius' father wearing the night he had died.  
  
Little bitch, he breathed. I suppose it's time to show you who's in charge around here. He slapped Remus again, harder. It hurt a lot more this time. Remus cried out, and it seemed to anger Nigel even further.  
  
Shut up, he said, taking out his cigarettes and lighter. Are you going to do what I say, or am I going to have to hurt you?  
  
Stay away from me! Remus shoved at him with his free hand. It barely made a difference, but Nigel looked as stunned as if Remus had slapped him back. He light a cigarette, his eyes narrowed through the smoke.  
  
Have it your way, he said coolly. He took the fag from his mouth and pushed up the sleeve of Remus' pajamas.  
  
---  
  
When it was over an hour later, Nigel rose and pulled on his trousers, then headed to the door. He turned, one hand on the knob. You got what you deserved. Don't you ever say no to me again, do you understand? He opened the door, then added spitefully : And just because you fought back, no drugs for you tonight. Suffer. He slammed the door behind him, leaving behind a terrified, miserable man in a considerable amount of pain.  
  
Had Remus thought today that Nigel was sadistic? Well, he fit the bill and more. He was brutal. He had forced Remus into submission by alternately hitting him and burning him with his cigarette, until Remus couldn't bear the pain anymore and had stopped fighting. He had been raped again, and Nigel had been so angry with him that he didn't dress Remus' wounds, or get him dressed. Remus reached for one of the blankets and wrapped it around himself, tears spilling down his bruised cheeks. If he fought back, he got hurt. If he didn't fight back, he was hurt anyway. He laid down and squeezed his eyes shut, shivering despite the blanket. His body ached, the burns total agony. Something trickled down the inside of his thigh, but whether it was Nigel's semen or his own blood he didn't know. He didn't really care at this point. In fact, he didn't care about anything. He wished he were dead.  
  
Remus couldn't sleep at all that night. Sometimes he fell into an uneasy doze, only to be awakened by unspeakable nightmares. He was exhausted, but he couldn't let himself sleep. Around sunrise he remembered Sirius, and wished with all his heart that he was home in bed with his lover. He hoped Sirius was looking for him. And he hoped that when Sirius found him and beat the living shit out of Nigel, he'd have the good fortune to witness it.  
  
---  
  
Sirius didn't sleep at all, either. He hadn't been able to find out anything new after he left the antiques shop, and had finally admitted defeat and gone home. But he hadn't been able to sleep. He couldn't get comfortable. Around four, he fell into a doze that was interrupted by a very bad nightmare in which a shadowy figure with long hair beat Remus bloody raw with a whip; he jerked awake, sweaty and panting with Remus' agonized screams still in his ears. He put his hands over his eyes and drew a long, shuddery breath. He wondered where Remus was, and what was happening to him now. Was he asleep, or was he being forced into doing... things with his kidnapper? His mind tried to present him with a horrible picture of Remus at the strange man's mercy, but Sirius pushed it away.  
  
He wanted a cigarette, but when he picked up the pack his hand began jittering so badly that the fags tumbled out of their package and fell to the floor. Remus' screams echoed in Sirius' mind, and he burst into tears. Somewhere, Remus was in pain, being hurt or tortured probably, and he, Sirius, could not help at all. He hugged his knees to his chest and cried quietly, the tears soaking the sheets.  
  
After forcing himself to take a sleeping pill, Sirius felt calmer but he still couldn't relax. His resolve hardened. He _had_ to find Remus. Before... before he was killed. Detective Burns had been right. There was a good possibility that the kidnapper would soon tire of Remus and kill him, burying his body in the backyard or throwing him into the Thames to be rid of him. The thought was like an iron fist clenching around Sirius' heart. If he lost Remus, he would kill himself. Just as he had sworn twenty years ago, when he feared Remus would leave him after finding out the truth about Williams' and O'Shea's murders. Yes. If Remus died, Sirius would join him with no hesitation.  
  
But it was not time for such drastic measures. Right now, he had to concentrate on finding his husband.  
  
He was not particularly surprised to find a blue envelope mingled in with the post that morning, but he was horribly shaken by what it contained. More photos, these close-ups of sections of Remus' body. But the focus of each picture were the small, round marks that marred Remus' pale skin. They looked like... burns? One on his left shoulder... another just below the birthmark on his left wrist... his neck, his thigh, his belly. Just looking at them made Sirius break out in a cold sweat.  
  
What kind of monster could have done this? And why?  
  
---  
  
Escape.  
  
Such a small word, such a common thought in literature. Escaping from prison, escaping from reality, escaping responsibility...  
  
Remus' mind contemplated this as he lay quite still, dazed, his thoughts seemingly going through a wall of pain before reaching him.  
  
How to escape.  
  
People escaped from prison all the time. They dug themselves out, hid in laundry carts, filed the bars off their windows, ran away from their jobs cleaning the motorway. There were a million ways to do it. Even half-witted people could escape from prison, as long as they were careful and took their time. Which was what Remus Lupin-Black needed to do.  
  
He sighed, but didn't hear himself do so. His mind was focused on escaping. The bloody handcuff was his major obstacle. That was what held him there and prevented him from throwing something through the window and screaming until someone called the police. He studied it sourly. The chain looked sound, the links too strong to break without the assistance of heavy pliers or perhaps a hammer and anvil. The cuff itself was fixed securely, closed just a bit too small to allow Remus' slender hand to slip through. If the difference had been minor, he would have attempted to pull his hand through, even if it meant broken fingers and torn ligaments. But the only way he'd get out of this cuff would be if someone chopped his hand off.  
  
Well, then. The radiator. Surely that would have some weakness, some flaw. He shook his head hopelessly. The radiator was very solid and quite heavy; if he could lift it, perhaps he'd have a chance. But no, it was bolted to the floor. There was no way he could get the radiator to lift, then...  
  
What could he do? He fell deep in thought. The only way he could get out of the cuff was if Nigel released him... then he could try to make a run for it... but Nigel wasn't happy with him right now, and would most likely leave him here without food or anything for days as a punishment... how would he be able to escape?  
  
The door creaked open, and Remus cringed at the sight of his captor. He tried to repress it, but he couldn't help himself. After all, the man was fantastically cruel and most likely had a screw loose. Nigel merely rolled his eyes.  
  
If you go on flinching like that, I might decide you're afraid of me and stop showing up, he said coolly. He approached the mattress, fishing a key out of his pocket. He unlocked the cuff, much to Remus' amazement. Remus winced and rubbed his arm, which was numb. His wrist was red where the cuff had been.  
  
What -? He didn't understand for a moment. Surely the man wasn't this stupid? Surely he knew Remus would try to do something? But Nigel merely smiled.  
  
I'm afraid I lost my temper with you earlier, my pet. I do feel awful. Come along, I'll make you feel better. His hand closed in a vise-like grip around Remus' wrist, pulling him to his feet and from the room.  
  
It was the first glimpse of the house Remus had gotten, besides the extra bedroom he was kept in. He looked around curiously as he was pulled down the hallway. The whole house was rather dim, and the wallpaper, a hideous print of yellow flowers, was faded. All the furniture looked rather like it had been scrounged from an old woman's basement, or perhaps a church rummage sale. Doilies and vases of dried flowers were prominent. Did Nigel live with someone? His mother or a grandmother? But he didn't have any time to wonder as he was pushed into a bathroom, and the door locked behind him.  
  
Remus wrinkled his nose. The blue tile floor had mysterious stains in places, the ceiling was waterspotted, and the walls were covered in truly awful wallpaper decorated with big green frogs. The tub was clean at least, and filled with soapy water. Nigel smiled charmingly. Go ahead, get in.  
  
Afraid to anger him, Remus did as he was told. The water stung and smarted against his burns, but he didn't whimper. He merely sat still and allowed Nigel to wash him, still thinking. Yes, the man was almost certainly mad. The way his mood could switch from happy to furious and back to happy in almost no time was a sign. And holding someone hostage, torturing them - wouldn't anyone have to be mad, to attempt that? He agreeably tilted his head back as Nigel rinsed shampoo from his hair. He didn't feel as nervous as he would have expected himself to be, though he should have been. But Remus was a very rational, calm person most of the time. His mind turned now to possible means of escape as Nigel helped him out of the bath and dried him off, applying aloe cream and gauze to his burns.  
  
Somewhere in the house, a telephone rang. Nigel handed Remus a pair of pajamas and went to answer it. Remus dressed swiftly, and peeked out of the bathroom. Nigel was at the end of the hall, his back turned, oblivious. Now might be his only chance!  
  
Remus took a deep breath and tiptoed out of the bathroom, slipping quickly down the stairs. They creaked ominously under his feet, and he bit his lip - would Nigel hear? He paused to listen. No, Nigel still didn't realise that his captive was escaping. Remus reached the bottom of the stairs to find himself in a living room that was as equally dim and badly decorated as the rest of the house; he tiptoed towards he front door. It was locked, but he undid the chain and slid back the bolt easily. Footsteps sounded above him, and he turned the knob.  
  
Nigel thundered down the stairs. Remus tore the door open and took two steps before strong arms caught him around the waist, lifting him off the ground. Remus struggled, preparing to scream, but Nigel squeezed him tight-tight, so Remus couldn't draw in a breath. He was dragged back inside, watching helplessly as the blessed sight of the street outside was cut off by the door. Nigel dumped him unceremoniously on the carpet and locked the door. He reached for something in the umbrella stand beside the door - a cane. It had a very sharp end. Remus swallowed hard. This was it. He was going to die -  
  
Nice attempt, but you're no Houdini, Nigel spat. Get up. He grabbed Remus' arm and hauled him back upstairs to his bedroom, pushing him onto the mattress with an annoyed grunt. After handcuffing his captive to the radiator once more, he swept his long hair out of his eyes and lit a cigarette. Again, Remus was reminded forcefully of Nigel's resemblance to the sixteen-year-old Sirius.  
  
Very funny. You keep that up, and you'll never see your Sirius again. He pulled something out of the wardrobe. It looked like a small tape recorder. Remus stared as it was set before him.  
  
What are you waiting for? Nigel looked impatient.  
  
What do you want? Remus asked.  
  
Simple. You want your Sirius to know you're still alive, correct? What better way than to send him a message? Nigel blew smoke towards the ceiling. You see, my love, though I am growing tired of you, I cannot kill you. Not yet, anyway. I'm not going to kill you until I have Sirius Black in my grasp - I will kill you in front of him, so he will know exactly what I went through back then!  
  
Remus had no idea what he meant. But the news that his death was imminent scared him badly. He shook his head furiously. No! I won't! I won't lure Sirius here -  
  
Nigel smacked him. Yes you will. But he won't come right away. I have no intention of telling him where you are. Let the great moron figure it out for himself. The pointed end of the cane came to rest below Remus' jaw, pressing against his throat. It felt very sharp. Now. Tell him you're scared, and you miss him. He pressed a button.  
  
Trembling, Remus began to speak.  
  
To Be Continued....  
  
---  
  
(A/N: I know! I know! I'm being so awful to Remus! I'm sorry! I hate doing it. I get teary-eyed writing these scenes, I really do. I feel so bad for him. I think I've read too many Stephen King books and watched too many gory movies. I don't like gore, but Jurassic Park was pretty violent, right? Back to the real issue - please don't hate me! (Though if you did, I'd understand... I'm beginning to hate me a little, too....) I love Remmie, I truly do, he and Siri are the very BEST Harry Potter characters (in my own humble opinion), and I'd just wither and die if anything like this happened to him by JK's hand. (But she couldn't put this in a children's book... but then again, since book 5, the HP world seems to be getting more and more adult...) I know it's awful. Please bear with me. Nigel will get what he deserves in the end, you bet. I won't tell you how or what, but you shall see. And the more he hurts Remmie, the happier we'll all be to see him in trouble, right? Right?)


	6. Suspicious Meeting

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 6 - Suspicious Meeting  
  
---  
  
Siri... help me, please - h-he says he'll k-kill me if you don't... I love you, please help me.... but he's set-mhhpmh!  
  
Sirius lit another cigarette, white as a ghost, his fingers trembling, as Burns leaned across the desk and hit the STOP button on the tape recorder. The detective frowned, tenting his fingers and closing his eyes. I had the lab boys run tests on it. It's an ordinary, garden-variety tape, the kind you can buy in any shop in the country. He must have used gloves, or something - there were no fingerprints or anything on the tape or the envelope. He fixed Sirius with a steely look. When did you say this arrived?  
  
J-just this morning. I found it with the rest of the post. Sirius tapped his cigarette over the ashtray on Burns' desk. I - I was afraid to open it... so I brought it here. It was true. He had been alarmed to find another envelope in the mail so soon after the last one, and its unusual shape and weight had perplexed him. He had brought it straight to the police and turned it over to Burns, but had left the photographs at home. Nobody would ever see them - he couldn't let anyone see what had happened to his Remus. As soon as his husband was safely home again, he would burn them. Every last one.  
  
Burns scratched his chin. There's no telling for sure when this tape was recorded, he mused. It could be recent... but on the other hand, he could have recorded it right after kidnapping your lover, and then.... He didn't finish, but Sirius knew what was on his mind. It was entirely possible that Remus was already dead, the photographs and tape put together only hours after Remus' disappearance, and the kidnapper was using them in a cruel, torturous way to make Sirius think his lover was still alive. Sirius stubbed out his fag and lit another, keeping his head down so Burns wouldn't see the tears stinging at his eyelids.  
  
The message on the tape was especially cryptic. What was Remus talking about? At the end of the message, it had sounded as if he had tried to say more, but had been cut off, probably muffled by the kidnapper's hand. Why would the kidnapper want Sirius to be there? Why was his presence necessary? _He says he'll kill me if you don't._ If he didn't come to help, Remus would be killed. That was obvious. He swallowed hard as Burns cleared his throat.  
  
Another thing. This woman told you she saw Remus get into a dark blue van with a long-haired stranger? When Sirius nodded, he sighed. It's all very well and good - at least we know _someone_ saw Remus... but do you know how many dark-blue vans there are in London? In England? What about Wales, Scotland? Ireland, even? There's no return address on the envelope the tape came in... no matter what that woman said, we're still no further along than we were. But I'll have a couple of my men ask her some follow-up questions, perhaps talk to the shop owner... He leaned forward, and his eyes were kind. I'm praying he's alive, Mr. Black. We'll catch this man and give him what he deserves.  
  
Sirius nodded, standing. He shook hands with Burns, and headed out to the car. They couldn't punish the kidnapper the way he deserved, because they only knew half of the story... He clenched his teeth, flicking his cigarette butt to the pavement and getting into the car. Never mind. _He_ would find Remus... and God help the man who had kidnapped him.  
  
---  
  
Remus was sitting up quietly on his mattress, one arm curled around his knees. The other was still cuffed to the radiator, and he was moving it in slow circles to keep the blood flowing. He felt rather apathetic after his failed escape, and at the moment he wasn't thinking of anything in particular, just staring straight ahead at the dark oak-paneled wall. The only thing on his mind was the knowledge that he had failed to escape, and that he might be here for the rest of his life - which was looking shorter and shorter by the moment. His stomach growled angrily at him, and he pressed his free hand against his tummy. How long had it been since he had last eaten? Three days, maybe more? Nigel liked to punish him by withholding food, and his escape attempt had made the man very angry. A tear trickled down Remus' cheek at the thought of what had followed... tape-recording that horrible message for Sirius. He must be at the end of his wits by now... Remus reckoned he had been gone over a week, but less than a month - hard to do, considering he had been drugged for a lot of the time. He wondered if Sirius had found out where he was, or if he had heard the tape. Would he be able to figure out where his husband was being held?  
  
The door creaked open. Remus' head snapped up and his heart leapt into his throat. By now, he associated that sound with imminent danger and severe pain.  
  
Good morning, my love, Nigel cooed. His hair was in a ponytail today, and he was dressed in nice trousers and a leather jacket. He had obviously just returned from work. Remus noticed he was carrying a bowl of soup, and his stomach growled louder. He couldn't help letting a whimper escape his throat, and Nigel smiled. You've been so good lately, and I'm sure you're hungry. He pulled the key to the handcuff from his pocket, then raised a slender eyebrow. Now, if I unchain you long enough to eat your dinner, will you be good?  
  
Remus was too hungry to care.  
  
Good boy. He was unchained and handed the soup. Eat slow, or you'll make yourself sick. He had said the same thing the first time Remus had awakened in this house, and Remus couldn't repress a shudder at the memory. But the soup was too tempting. He began to eat, not caring how hot it was. Nigel sat at the foot of the mattress, his long legs crossed in front of him. Is it good?  
  
Anything would have tasted good at this point, but Remus was eager to keep his captor in a good mood. T-thank you.  
  
You're very welcome. See how easy it is to be good? One hand reached out and stroked Remus' hair. So... lovely. I wish we could have met under different circumstances... you could have modeled for me...  
  
Remus accepted the napkin he was offered.  
  
Why, yes. I'm a photographer, dear. I guess it never came up. I do hope the photos I sent to your dear Sirius came out all right.  
  
The spoon clattered against the empty bowl. Remus said faintly. No... you.... you sent them to him?  
  
Of course. I told you I would, Nigel said mildly, looking slightly surprised.  
  
No. He couldn't have... when Sirius saw those photos... what would he think? Would he think Remus had gone along willingly? Of course not, not with the injuries... but a lingering fear remained in Remus' stomach. Sirius would be furious. He was a very protective and jealous man ordinarily; when he found out his lover had had sex with another man, even if it wasn't consensual...  
  
He'll kill you, Nigel breathed in his ear. He kissed the side of Remus' neck. Think about it. When he saw those photos, can you imagine how he felt? He must have been furious. That's why he hasn't shown up, even after the photos and the tape... _especially _ the tape...  
  
No, it isn't, Remus whispered, tears welling up in his eyes. He doesn't know where I am! Until he finds out... when he does, y-you'll be so s-sorry... he'll kill _you_....  
  
He _is _ good at killing, isn't he? Nigel snarled. You're wrong, my pet. He couldn't care less about you. That's the real reason why he hasn't come for you.  
  
It was one thing to think so, but Remus was damned if he'd listen to Nigel voicing his very worst fears. Shut up! You don't know _anything_ about Sirius!  
  
You think so, don't you? Nigel shouted, raising his hand to slap his hostage. I know a bit more about him than you think I do - he's the one who ruined my life!  
  
Remus was tired of being hit. He shoved Nigel away from him, struggling to his feet and running for the doorway. Nigel made a lunge for him, roaring; Remus dodged, and the man's fingers scrabbled helplessly across the back of his ankle. Furious, Remus turned quickly round and kicked out; Nigel howled in pain as Remus' foot connected with his shoulder. Remus had been aiming for his face, but had missed. Still, he felt a grim pleasure at hurting the man who had hurt _him_ so many times. He raced for the stairs, Nigel in pursuit. Nigel made another lunge at the top of the stairs, catching Remus round the waist. He would have ended the chase there and then, if it weren't for Remus' determination. Remus threw his weight forward, and they went tumbling down the stairs. It was quite a painful, bumpy trip, but at least Nigel's hands were jarred loose. Gasping, his body aching from the fall, Remus crawled across the floor, trying to get to the door. Nigel seized him by the ankle and pulled him back.  
  
Let go of me! Remus' eyes darted around for the nearest weapon - the only thing within reach was a glass vase of putrid-looking dried petunias. He grabbed it and waved it threateningly at Nigel. Let me go, or I'll - I'll -  
  
Shut up. Nigel couldn't reach Remus' face, so he gave him a sharp slap on the bum. Remus yelped, and swung the vase down. His captor dodged at the last second, the vase shattering on the thin carpet and sending dried, crumbly petunias flying. By a stroke of luck, Remus didn't get cut. He grabbed the largest shard and jabbed it at Nigel's hand as it inched towards his leg once more. He jabbed just a little too hard. The glass broke the skin, but Remus didn't feel the least bit of sympathy as Nigel yelled and yanked his hand back. Bright red blood spattered the cream-coloured carpet.  
  
Now was the time to escape. Remus crawled to the door, cutting his heel on one of the shards of glass but not caring. He was almost there when Nigel landed on him like a ton of bricks, breathing heavily. Where do you think you're going, love?  
  
Remus stabbed out blindly with the glass; a long, jagged cut appeared under Nigel's right eye. The glass dug painfully into Remus' palm and he gasped, dropping it. Blood ran down his fingers and over the bright gleam of his wedding ring. Clutching his wounded left hand to his chest, Remus reached for the piece of glass, but Nigel grabbed it first and threw it out of reach.  
  
And I thought you were going to be a good boy, he panted. That Sirius gets you fired up, doesn't he? I just mention his name and you go from sweetie to brat almost instantly. Has he got you on that short a leash? He reached up and fumbled something into view -- the cane from the other night. He held the sharp tip at Remus' throat. Or have you got him on a leash? It wouldn't surprise me -  
  
Let me up, Remus demanded angrily. He was tired of listening to Nigel's meaningless talk. You're mad! I won't stay here any longer! Let me up!  
  
You act as though you're here by choice, Nigel said, sounding amused. How cute. But the answer is still no, my love. You're not going anywhere. Your Sirius must come to you.  
  
Remus lifted his knee and jabbed it into his captor's stomach; it had been unexpected, and Nigel rolled off him with a grunt of pain - unfortunately wedged between Remus and the door. Remus staggered to his feet and grabbed the cane, backing up. There _must_ be a back way out - there must - Nigel advanced on him, his green eyes narrowed. Give me that.  
  
Remus clutched the cane tighter with both hands. Blood dribbled down the shaft. Leave me alone!  
  
Give it to me!  
  
Remus swung it at him. The cane had a heavy ball of amber attached to the top. It connected with his wounded cheek, quite hard. Nigel screamed in pain and stopped moving forward, his eyes widening in disbelief. He turned his head slightly and spat two teeth onto the floor.  
  
You bitch, he said in wonder, staring down at them with one hand pressed against his bruised, bleeding cheek. You knocked out my teeth.  
  
Remus hadn't stopped backing away. He bumped up against a wall. No, not a wall. A doorknob jabbed into his back. Keeping a tight grip on the cane with his right hand, he inched his left hand behind him, leaving smears of blood on the wall. He grasped the doorknob, turning it slowly, his eyes on Nigel. Then, with a triumphant shriek, he threw the door open and whirled around, one foot forward, expecting to see sunlight and other houses and automobiles and _people_ - but saw only blackness.  
  
He fell painfully, down what felt like an even longer and harder staircase than the one upstairs. He landed on a cold, damp floor, completely winded. The cane clattered nearby, but it was so dark, he couldn't see it. Gasping, he lay quite still. Where was he? He could hear something dripping, and the squeaks of what sounded like rats. A cellar?  
  
The lights snapped on and he yelped in surprise, looking up. Nigel stood at the head of a rickety wooden staircase, one hand on the switch. The staircase was spotted with blood where Remus' hand had hit it on the way down. They were definitely in a cellar; an ancient washer-dryer stood nearby, cobwebs decorated every surface, and there was a shelf of canned things which looked like they hadn't been touched in years. It was a very damp and gloomy place.  
  
Nigel was breathing heavily. His cheek was slowly turning a dark-purple colour and swelling; its appearance was only made worse by the gash under his eye. His mouth twisted into a wicked smile. Nice try, my love. But it didn't quite work, did it? He chuckled unpleasantly. The irony is, the cellar door is right next to the back door leading outside. If you hadn't picked the wrong one, you'd be running to your lover right now. He brushed stray hair out of his eyes. How would you like it if I left you down here, then?  
  
Remus choked out. It was awful to be imprisoned in that bedroom, but being trapped in the cellar would be far worse. He could hear the rats burrowing in the walls; they weren't likely to be shy for long. And a damp, dark place like this was bound to be overrun with spiders... millipedes... maybe even cockroaches. But the most horrifying thought of all was that Nigel would leave him down here in the dark, not even the smallest bit of light to cheer him, with the rodents and insects and.... eurgh! Remus swallowed hard, panic rising inside him. No, please, don't leave me here, he begged. I-I'm sorry, I won't try to get away again, j-just - don't leave me down here!  
  
Still smiling, Nigel descended the rickety staircase. Give me the cane.  
  
Trembling, Remus held it out. Nigel wiped the blood off on his trousers, and tucked the stick under his arm. He helped Remus up. Come along, my pet. We'll go bandage your paw.  
  
It was a great relief to be away from that musty, damp cellar. Remus was silent as he was brought upstairs and handcuffed to the radiator once more. Nigel cleaned and bandaged his sliced hand, then kissed his sweaty forehead. Back to being good, I see. I suppose you're afraid of the dark.  
  
It wasn't true; Remus normally didn't mind the dark, but he did when he was surrounded by unknown, nasty creatures. He laid down and curled up into a little ball. Nigel rose. Don't think I'm done with you yet. But I have things to do first. Cheerio.  
  
---  
  
Come on, Sirius, try to be a little more cheerful, Lily said, looking up at the dark-haired man. You're scaring all the little old ladies.  
  
Sirius merely grunted in reply and reached up for the tomato paste on the highest shelf.  
  
Lily Evans had been a friend of Remus' since before he and Sirius met; she and her boyfriend James Potter had always been interested in the Mysterious Stranger' Remus had been seeing. Now James and Lily were married, and had a small son named Harry. Normally, Sirius loved playing with the little boy, but today he wasn't in the best of moods. It was now nearly two weeks since Remus had vanished, and he couldn't help from fearing the worst. He had met Lily at the market, and she had persuaded him to join the Potters for dinner that night. He was wandering through the market with her now, mostly because it felt soothing to have a friend close by, and partly because Lily was too short to reach items on the high shelves.  
  
I'm sure Remus is fine, Lily continued, checking tomato paste' off on her grocery list and pushing the carriage down the aisle. He can take care of himself. You of all people should know that by now.  
  
Uncle Remmie on an adv'ture, little Harry crowed from the carriage, tossing a bag of frozen peas to the floor.  
  
Sirius forced himself to smile at the small boy, bending over to retrieve the peas. Wherever Remus was, it couldn't be considered an adventure, and he was probably having a lot less fun than Harry thought he was. However, he ruffled the boy's hair. You bet.  
  
Siri, mind going over to the deli and fetching me a half-pound of turkey? Lily asked absently. Her entire attention had been drawn to two brands of cereal that were on sale, and she was debating over which was the better buy. Things like this took Lily several minutes; so Sirius agreed. He hoisted Harry out of the carriage, perched him on his hip, and headed for the deli.  
  
They had only gone a few paces when someone rounded the corner and bumped into them; groceries tumbled to the floor. Sirius caught the fellow by his arm before he could fall. Sorry, chap - didn't see you coming, God, I'm clumsy sometimes -  
  
No, no... I'm sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going... The two men knelt to gather up the fallen groceries. When it was all set to rights, they rose. The other man swept his long brown hair out of his eyes. One cheek was horribly bruised, a bulky bandage under one eye. His hand was wrapped in bandages as well.  
  
What happened to you? Sirius asked blankly, as Harry burbled and cried, Boo boo!  
  
A-accident at work, the man said shiftily, his eyes not meeting Sirius'. He moved away, the raven-haired man frowning after him.  
  
Strange bloke, he said to Harry, before resuming his quest for turkey.  
  
He dismissed the man from his mind, but was startled to see him ahead of himself and Lily in the checkout line. Long brown hair... something clicked in his mind. He watched closely as the man paid and headed out the door. He was walking towards a dark blue van...  
  
Sirius plopped Harry down in the carriage. Sorry, Lil, I've got to go.  
  
Lily was startled. What are you talking about?  
  
I've got to do something.  
  
Are you still coming for dinner? Lily called.  
  
I'll try! He pushed through the line, ignoring protests and angry mutters. The man was climbing into his van as Sirius dashed across the parking lot to his car. Long brown hair and a dark blue van... he was probably wrong, but there was no way he would let the possibility of finding Remus escape him... and the man had seemed very suspicious in the market, like he was hiding something. No, it was all just too much of a coincidence. Most likely Burns would go mad at him for going after a lead without informing him, and possibly for stalking innocent citizens, but Sirius didn't care.  
  
He was as discreet as possible trailing the van. It led him to a neighbourhood made up of scrungy-looking townhouses and dirty sidewalks, overflowing dustbins at every corner. Carefully, Sirius parked some ways away from the townhouse the van stopped at. He watched as the man removed his groceries from the back of the van and headed inside. Well, this was a slight problem. How was Sirius going to follow? He couldn't just go knocking on the door, but what was he to do? What if Remus was in that house?  
  
The door of the townhouse opened again. Barely daring to breathe, Sirius watched as the man climbed into his van and drove off. Where was he going? Would he be back soon?  
  
Never mind. Sirius got out of the car and hurried up the street. Maybe the man was only heading out for a moment, but that was long enough to check the house and see if Remus was there. He looked around when he reached the door of the townhouse. The streets were deserted, and the nearest buildings had their shades drawn.  
  
The door was locked. No matter. A few rams with his shoulder and it burst open. It was a very cheap lock, Sirius noted. He gazed around as he shut the door behind him. It was a very dim, dusty place that looked rather like it belonged to an elderly woman with a fondness for cats, instead of someone Sirius' age. Vases of dried flowers were scattered about the room, resting on doilies; the furniture was quite old and shabby; the pictures on the wall hung in majestic, old-fashioned gilded frames. He moved into the kitchen. Here he received an unpleasant surprise - smears of something on the back wall. It looked like dried blood. He turned quickly, bumping into the counter and upsetting a tall cup holding several cooking utensils. The whole lot tumbled into the sink with a clatter. Cursing under his breath, Sirius returned the cup to its proper place and put the utensils back inside. He retreated hastily back into the living room, and turned his attention to the stairs. He climbed them slowly, wincing every time one squeaked.  
  
Is someone out there? Please, help me...  
  
Sirius head jerked around. The voice had come from a door on his left, and it sounded like... like...  
  
He tore the door open, and his eyes widened. It was Remus, laying on the same stained mattress that had been in the photographs. He was dressed in a pair of pajamas too big for him, his left hand wrapped in bandages. He was bruised and disheveled, his eyes wide with fear and desperation. But it was Remus, and he was alive.  
  
Remus could barely believe his eyes. He thought he must be hallucinating. Sirius stood in the doorway, looking amazed. He had come. He was here. Everything was going to be all right now - assuming this really was Sirius, and not a dream.  
  
R-Remmie - His husband crossed the room in two long strides and fell to his knees beside him. Remus whimpered as he was drawn into Sirius' strong arms, tears spilling down his cheeks. He put his free arm around Sirius, clinging to him like a drowning man clutching at a straw. Sirius' hands ran up his back, his lips placing kisses on Remus' forehead, his cheeks, his lips. Oh, God, Remmie - my love - oh, darling - I found you - Sirius was weeping as well, the kisses growing steadily wetter and saltier, but Remus didn't care. He hugged Sirius tighter and closed his eyes, breathing in the smell of his lover, the scent he had missed so much. He wasn't thinking of what had happened to him or what Sirius might think. Every part of his being was just glad to be in Sirius' arms again. It was okay now. Nothing bad could happen with Sirius nearby.  
  
What is this? Sirius asked softly. He had found the handcuff. His fingers ran along the chain, frown lines appearing on his brow. Who chained you like this?  
  
Remus shook his head against Sirius' shoulder. I want to go home.  
  
I know. I have to get you out of this first.... Sirius let go of Remus and stood. Hold on... I'm going to poke around a little. The key has to be around here somewhere.  
  
Don't leave me... Remus begged. It isn't, it can't be... he always takes it with him... He caught hold of Sirius' t-shirt. He was terrified. He didn't want Sirius to leave. He might never come back.  
  
Sirius knelt, cupping Remus' chin in his hand. Who takes what?  
  
N-Nigel... takes the key.  
  
Nigel? Is that the bloke who did this to you?  
  
Siri -  
  
His lover was growing red in the face. Is that the bastard who did those things to you? His eyes were nearly black with rage. I'll kill him, he whispered, forgetting all his previous vows. I swear, I'll kill him, I'll make what he did to you look like a bloody walk in the park -  
  
No, Siri! Remus begged. Stop, listen to me - he's - I know him, he was one of Williams' friends!  
  
The comment had the effect of a slap on his husband. Sirius looked stunned.   
  
That's right, a cold voice said from the doorway, and both men turned to see Nigel standing there. I knew him. And you killed him. I saw the whole thing. Now, Black - I will kill Remus in front of you, and you will know the pain _I_ felt back then!  
  
He advanced on them, drawing out a long knife.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
---  
  
(A/N: Hahahaha! I am the cliffhanger queen! I wrote this whole chapter while roasting in the heat of my room, watching Ren & Stimpy and listening to the Beatles. (Not at the same time, of course.) Spellcheck was done listening to Sailor Moon music. But I'm on a roll here. I'm coming close to the end, and it's getting more and more exciting. You know what other Stephen King story this reminds me of? Misery'! I never saw the movie, but I've read the book tons of times. It's about a crazy woman who holds her favourite writer hostage after he's injured in a car crash. Wah!! The similarities are scary. That's another creepy book, though not as gory as Gerald's Game'. However, the gory parts in Misery' are pretty awful. Eurgh.  
  
But now it's lunchtime. I'm off to eat egg salad and read Magic Knight Rayearth. Until chapter 7, adieu.)


	7. Truth Revealed

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.

-The Haunted-

Chapter 7 - Truth Revealed ---

Sirius stepped protectively between Remus and Nigel. He looked confused, yet fury was still etched on his face. In fact, he _was_ confused. What did this guy mean? He had seen Williams' murder? So he knew who had committed it. It looked like the writer of the notes had been found. Sirius' mind raced. Somehow, he'd have to stall Nigel and get Remus unchained, then call the police. It seemed nearly impossible - but he had to try. Casually, almost carelessly, just to buy himself more time, Sirius spoke. So you wrote the notes, didn't you?Of course I did. Very clever, Black. Nigel smiled. Even after the first one, I was surprised you didn't go to the police and tell them someone was concocting lies about you. But then, you knew they'd make connections if you did, am I right? You've been going to that detective that investigated Augustus' case all those years ago. If he read my notes, he'd know something was up.And you sent those awful pictures, Sirius whispered.

Yes, I did. How did you like them? I'll bet they turned you on. Didn't they? I suppose sadism is all a part of the little games you play. You like seeing people suffer, don't you, Black?The only person I want to see suffering right now is you, Sirius growled. I'd kill you right now, if I hadn't promised Remus I wouldn't. Nigel pretended to look shocked. My pet made you promise not to kill anyone? I expect he'd say something different now. I treated him like a prince, but he doesn't seem to appreciate my efforts. He kept trying to get away from me. That's why I had to discipline him. Did you see what he did to my kitchen wall? He made a beastly mess with his bleeding paw.Shut up, Sirius snarled. I might not be able to kill you, but I can hurt you very badly.Remus is so precious to you that you'll kill anyone who so much as looks at him. I'd say you have a bit of a jealousy complex, mate. Nigel, Remus realised, was _enjoying _ this. He was smiling pleasantly, his eyes never straying from Sirius' furious face. Remus knew quite well by now that making people suffer was a kind of hobby for Nigel, and making Sirius steadily angrier was fun for him. That could be bad. There was no telling what lengths he might go to, or how far he might push Sirius. Any of them might end up dead by the time this was all over.

Jealousy complex or no, I've come to take him home, Sirius said in a voice of forced calm. Get him out of that blasted handcuff. I'm going to call the police and have them pick you up.You think asking nicely will make me do anything? Not after I've finally got you here. We're going to have this out right now. Nigel fingered the knife lovingly. But I assume you'd like to hear _why_ I've done this, correct? Why I bothered kidnapping your lover and writing you notes and sending all those lovely pictures? Well, I'll tell you. He stuck the knife in his belt and smiled charmingly. Have a seat.

Sirius considered his options. He wouldn't leave the room without Remus. Nigel was between him and the door anyway, and if he tried anything, he would probably get hurt. He didn't want to fight if it was at all possible. If he stayed and listened to what Nigel had to say, he might be able to think up a way to escape, or at least lure Nigel away from Remus. It wasn't likely that he could get away easily; even if he managed to get out of the house, Remus would be left at the mercy of this monster while Sirius tried to call for help.

He sat. All right. Fire away.Sirius - Remus clutched at his sleeve. Sirius shook his head slightly. Nigel lit a cigarette and began to speak.

I don't think I need to fill you in on what happened to Augustus Williams, he said smoothly. You know _that_ very well. But you didn't know that someone saw you. That someone was me. I was walking by the park that night and saw you dragging Williams' body outside the gates. At first I didn't realise what had happened. I thought you had fought and knocked him unconscious. But after you left, I went to investigate. I discovered he was dead.If you knew all that, why didn't you call the police? Sirius asked.

Nigel turned away, his face suddenly contorting. Because I - I broke down completely after seeing that. After s-seeing Augustus carved up like a Christmas goose... after realising I'd never - never have the chance to - His voice sounded unusually thick. He turned back to Sirius and Remus, and he was weeping. You killed him, Black! And when I saw that, I... I couldn't take it! I ran... I didn't think of the police! All I was thinking of was - was - my lover was dead! Sirius and Remus said in unison, stunned. It was absolutely unexpected. Williams had been a crude, violent, horrible person - how could anyone have possibly loved him?

Yes, my lover! Nigel wept. He - he was everything to me! He was rude and insufferable to everyone he met - but not with me. When we were together, he was a whole other person! He was sweet. He loved me. We loved each other so much, but we couldn't be together. Our parents... were so furious. They forbid us to see one another. Augustus was angry because you two were together and no one cared! _No one_ cared! But Augustus and I couldn't be together! He was s-so angry about it! Even... even in bed... he hurt me sometimes, but I know he didn't mean to... he was just so upset. He raised his eyes to Sirius'. When you killed him... you destroyed everything life was worth to me! Without Augustus, life wasn't worth anything! He wiped his eyes on his sleeve. I wanted to die. I would have killed myself. But then you... both of you... got off with no problems at all. You killed my lover and you got away with it! his voice rose to an almost hysterical level. Augustus was dead and you two were perfectly fine! I didn't kill myself. I decided to stay alive... so I could get revenge for Augustus. I never went to the police. Anything they would do to you would be too easy. I waited... bided my time... until I felt it was time to strike. He stood, pulling out the knife; Sirius jumped to his feet as well. You were so happy... just like Augustus and I... it was time to ruin it all for you!

He lunged at Sirius with a hoarse cry, raising the knife to strike. Sirius reached up and grabbed Nigel's wrist, forcing the blade away from them. At the same time, he grabbed Nigel's other arm, to keep him from struggling. So killing Remus will make things even? he snarled. He didn't do anything. Your problem is with me. Leave Remus out of this!It's too late now, Nigel shouted. You both have to die. Remus didn't go to the police, either! He _protected_ you! He protected a _murderer_ ! He's just as guilty as you are! It's not fair - I lost my lover, and by all rights you should have lost Remus! If I kill him, you will spend the rest of your life in misery, and you will know what I had to go through... you will have to live with the pain... waking up at night with your lover gone, not being able to see his face or hear his voice, never able to hold him ever again!Like I haven't already! Sirius yelled, his nose barely an inch from Nigel's. I've been in _hell_ all this time! With Remus gone, it was like - like the whole world had just stopped. Without Remus, there _is_ no world as far as I'm concerned! He pushed the man away from him in disgust.

It's not the same thing! Nigel shrieked. Both men looked almost mad by now; Remus bit his lip, wide eyes flickering from his lover to his captor and back. He had never seen Nigel this angry, not even when he tried to escape. The man was insane, and there was no telling what he would do if Sirius kept pressing him like this. He tugged unhappily at the handcuff. If only he was free... he could be running to the nearest telephone right now, while the other two were occupied with their argument.

You don't get it, do you? All my life, this has been eating away at me! It's ruined my life! All I want to do is ruin yours. Then we'd be even. Nigel was gripping the knife tightly as he and Sirius circled each other warily. Sirius didn't have a weapon, and he could get badly hurt if a fight ensued. Remus swallowed hard.

Boo hoo, it's ruined my life, everything's your fault.' Do you _hear_ yourself? Sirius snarled. Trying to blame everything on me. If you really wanted closure and completion, you could've gone straight to the police and I'd still be rotting in gaol, even now. But you _chose_ to live with it! You _chose_ to subject yourself to the torture. His midnight eyes narrowed. As far as I'm concerned, you _should _ have killed yourself. You wouldn't have had to live with all this pain, and you wouldn't have grown up to do horrible things to another man's lover. You should be dead. I swear to God I'd kill you right now.Then why don't you? Nigel whispered. Vow or no vow? It would be very easy to cover it up.... just like you did with Augustus... and you'd have your precious back. But you're not going to, are you? No, of course not. The police will get suspicious if Remus just comes home out of the blue like that, with no cover story. I'm sure you two could make up something, right? He stopped moving, and looked at Remus. The other man recoiled from the look of lust and hunger in his captor's eyes. It was the same expression he wore both times he had raped Remus. Your little pet does anything you tell him to do, doesn't he? And he'll tell the police exactly what you tell him to say. He smiled sweetly, catching Remus' chin roughly between his thumb and forefinger and kissing him hard.

Sirius lunged and rammed Nigel out of the way with his shoulder. The knife fell with a clatter, and Sirius kicked it away as he and Nigel fell to the floor, wrestling. A key ring tumbled from Nigel's pocket, the bright gleam of the handcuff key catching Remus' eye instantly. He snatched up the key and unlocked the cuff with a triumphant shriek. His arm prickled painfully with pins and needles, and a red welt marked the place where the cuff had dug into his wrist. But he was _free_. Free!

Get back here! Nigel roared as Remus stood, struggling to get out from under Sirius. You bitch, you aren't getting away that easily! One hand shot out and caught Remus by the ankle; he went sprawling, a cry of pain escaping his lips. Sirius growled and grabbed Nigel by the throat.

Never - touch - my - Remus - AGAIN, he said in a deadly whisper. Goddamn you, you keep your hands off him. I've touched him with more than just my hands, mate, Nigel choked, his eyes glinting with malice. My tongue and my willy come to mind -

Sirius' fingers tightened, and Nigel's sentence was cut off abruptly. Sirius bent down so their noses were an inch apart, his teeth bared. Forget vows. I'm going to kill you right now.

Nigel brought up his knee in one quick movement, catching Sirius hard in the stomach. Sirius gasped and let go of Nigel, rolling to the side. Remus crawled away as Nigel stood, massaging his throat and shaking his hair out of his eyes. You sure talk big. But you're not going to kill me. Nigel grabbed Remus by the collar of his pajamas, hauling him to his feet. Remus cried out in pain as he was pulled against his rapist. Something very sharp was placed at his throat.

Sirius froze. Remus shut his eyes, quivering, too scared to make a sound. Nigel grinned. It was a good fight, Black. But when I put my mind to something, I can't fail. I'm determined to kill your bitch. Now, get up.

Slowly, his eyes never leaving Nigel's face, Sirius stood. Nigel shooed him back with one hand, and Sirius backed up until he bumped against the wall. Remus met his husband's eyes, terrified. Completely sure he was inches from death, he willed Sirius to know what he was thinking - _I love you... I'm sorry for everything... Siri, I love you so much...'_

His lover clearly understood. His eyes told Remus all he needed to know. He swallowed. If he was going to die, it would be better to know he had Sirius' love and forgiveness. Even if he didn't deserve it. He shut his eyes tightly, waiting for Nigel to slit his throat and end it all. But it didn't happen. A loud crash made him open his eyes. Nigel yelled in surprise, his grip loosening, and Remus pushed him away. His captor fell backwards onto the mattress, the knife flying out of his hand. Sirius seized Remus by the hand and pulled him from the room. As they fled, Remus looked back to see Nigel's camera, smashed on the floor - Sirius had thrown it at the radiator, causing the crash that had forced Nigel to release him.

Thunderous footfalls behind them meant Nigel still hadn't given up. As they entered the living room, Sirius opened a door at random and shoved Remus inside. Not a sound, he hissed.

Siri, you'll get hurt!Shh! Go out the window and get help! The door shut in his face. Remus bit his lip and pressed his ear to the door, listening hard. The footsteps stopped, and Nigel's voice sounded.

Where is he?Running to the police, Sirius said, perhaps a bit louder than necessary. Remus' eyes widened, and he looked quickly around the room. It was a small bedroom, just neat and dusty enough to make him believe it was solely a guest room. There was a window in the wall opposite, offering a view of the grimy street outside. Sirius was keeping Nigel distracted so Remus could escape and go for help - but he couldn't make himself do it. What would Sirius do? What if Nigel killed him before the police could come?

I'll just kill you, then, before they get here, Nigel's voice floated through the door. And as soon as Lupin and his bobby friends arrive, I'll kill him, too - never mind what they do to me afterwards. I wish I could have stuck to the original plan, but you've made it quite complicated, Black. I'll just have to hope God won't fall for your cover-ups as easily as everyone else did.I'll see you in hell, then, Sirius' voice was cool and collected. Remus swallowed hard and tiptoed across the room. The window was locked. He pushed at the latch. It was old, and probably hadn't been used in years. It was stuck. Remus bit back a cry of frustration and pushed harder. It still refused to budge.

Perhaps he's not gone yet. Nigel sounded just as calm as Sirius. Perhaps he's just hiding... waiting for the opportune moment to run. Remus shoved harder. The latch flew back with a snap that seemed nearly deafening. Had anyone heard that?

Keeping an eye on you... I know he wouldn't run, no matter what you told him. Maybe he obeys your every command, but he also sticks close to you like a pathetic cur.

The window was difficult to push as well. Remus threw all his remaining strength into it. It moved slowly upwards, inch by torturous inch. And what was worse, Nigel's voice was coming closer. Remus shut his eyes and pushed.

Maybe he doesn't like to obey orders? He was ever such a frightful beast when I first brought him home. I had to keep him drugged. It was the only way I could get him to do anything, and the only way I could keep him from escaping. But the drugs I had to use are very hard to get, you see, and I had to resort to chaining him up instead.

Finally! The window gave up and shot open, offering a gap large enough for Remus to wriggle through. He looked warily over at the door. He prayed Sirius would be all right while he went to fetch help. He slid his legs out the window, easing himself out carefully, then hung by his arms for a moment, clutching at the outside sill. He braced himself, and let go. It was only a short fall to the pavement, but it wasn't the best thing for a man in Remus' condition. Wincing, he struggled to his feet and looked around. The street was almost empty - except for a woman leaning out her window, watering flowers in her windowbox. Remus dashed over to ask the use of her telephone.

---

He's gone, Sirius repeated stubbornly. He hoped Remus had gotten away safely, and wasn't hanging around eavesdropping. He wasn't going to leave the house until he was sure. He had to keep this madman occupied long enough for help to arrive... He's gone for help. Stop poking around for him under your furniture, because he's gone! Nigel snarled.

Sirius decided on a different tack, to keep the man's mind off Remus. What were you saying about Williams? He used to hurt you? Why did you let him?Shut up! He didn't mean it! Nigel looked furious, the knife held out warningly, but Sirius stood his ground.

Didn't mean it? As far as I could tell, Williams got nothing out of life but pleasure from hurting people. He was the school's biggest bully. He used to chase Remus all the time - either to beat or shag him senseless, I'm not sure which. He was a cruel person. How could you have possibly loved him?Shut up! Just shut up! Nigel shouted.

Maybe you're one of those sick lads who _likes_ being hurt! Sirius continued. Maybe it was all a fun, kinky game to you, too! Did he have to hit you to get it up? Was it like that? He couldn't get in the mood until he smacked you around a little bit?You're the one who's sick! Nigel screamed. The knife clattered to the ground, and he backed away, bumping into a small desk and tearing at his hair. That's disgusting! Augustus loved me!He loved _hurting_ you, you mean! Sirius shouted back. Dimly, in the distance, he could hear sirens wailing. He never loved you the way you wanted him to, did he? And that's why your family didn't want you with him! They were afraid he'd hurt you so bad you'd never be able to walk again - or even worse, that he'd kill you. That's what it was, wasn't it? He got a rush out of hurting you, but you _liked_ it! By the time you realised how bad he really was, you were too scared to get out! And by now you're so goddamned horrified at it all that you've completely blocked it from your memory! But it did happen that way, didn't it?!_Yes, for God's sake, yes, will you please shut up?!_ Nigel shrieked. _He hurt me! He spanked me, whipped me, beat me up, tied me to the bed and _ raped _me, and I liked it, I LIKED IT, but then he hurt me worse and worse every time until I could barely get up after it was over - but what do you know?! What gives you the right to judge?!Because you're trying to blame me for __your_ pain and suffering. Sirius growled. And what's worse, you're making Remus pay for sins you and I and Williams committed. I killed Williams. But you would have eventually done it yourself, am I right? The only way to stop the torture he put you through would be to kill your tormentor! Only I beat you to it. He pushed his hair out of his eyes. And when you suffered that mental breakdown, you managed to convince yourself that I was the evil one, and your lover was an innocent victim. So you tried to get revenge on me by subjecting my husband to the same thing Williams subjected you to years ago!I hate you... Nigel's eyes flickered nervously to the front door. The wail of police sirens was very close now. I hate you for it. I wanted to kill Augustus. But I never got the chance! He reached behind him, opening one of the desk drawers and rummaging around in it. His piercing green eyes never left Sirius' midnight-blue ones. I wish I had killed Remus... I wish I had killed him and sent his head to you. I wish I had tied him up and made you watch as I had my way with him! He pulled something out of the drawer just as cars screeched to a halt outside and footsteps sounded. It was a pistol. Goodbye, Black. He cocked the gun and pulled the trigger.

The gun went off with a deafening bang. Blood, horribly red, splattered the wall and floor. Sirius' eyes widened in horror as he collapsed to the floor, clutching at his chest. He felt completely numb. His mouth opened and closed silently, unable to make a sound. His eyes shut.

The door flew open and police officers surged in, stopping at the sight of the man sprawled at their feet, his long hair wet with blood.

Detective Burns lowered his gun. My - my God. he whispered hoarsely. What - what happened here?

Sirius struggled to his feet, feeling very ill. He avoided looking at the still form on the carpet, at the spreading pool of blood. H-he shot himself. I- I thought he was g-going for me but h-he.... He closed his eyes and hurried into the kitchen, bumping into things in his haste. He reached the sink just in time to vomit.

---

Ten minutes later, Sirius trudged outside accompanied by a burly bobby. His knees were still weak and his mouth tasted terrible, but he didn't care. He felt drained, exhausted - but he also felt almost crushingly depressed. In the end, Nigel had been a victim, too. There was no forgiving him for what he did to Remus, but Sirius also felt sorrow and pity for the young man Nigel had once been, kept under control by a violent lover. Sirius knew how painful it was to be controlled by someone who was supposed to love you.

Your lover's over there. The bobby pointed him to an ambulance parked at the edge of the circle of emergency vehicles. Remus was sitting on the back bumper, wrapped in a blanket. Sirius wound his way through the police cars to reach him.

Oi. You should be in a hospital, love, Sirius said softly, crouching down to see into his husband's eyes.

I wouldn't let them take me until I was sure you were coming out alive, Remus whispered. One pale, shaking hand emerged from the folds of blanket to touch Sirius' cheek. I t-thought he was going to kill you.He killed himself, Sirius muttered, putting his own hand over Remus'. Williams wasn't his lover. He only saw Nigel as a cheap sex toy, tortured him and hurt him bad enough to make him forget his own past. After that mental breakdown, he was able to convince himself that Williams had been nothing but sweet and kind to him, and that I was the evil one who murdered his lover for no reason.That poor man, Remus whispered. Despite everything Nigel had put him through, a small part of his heart ached with sorrow for him.

I'm more concerned about you right now. We should be getting to the hospital. They should at least run tests to be sure whatever he was shooting you full of didn't have any lasting side effects.In a minute. Remus leaned over, putting his arms around Sirius' neck. I need a hug right now. I- I missed you so much. I love you, you know.I do know. I love you too. Sirius put his arms around Remus' waist, resting his cheek against the top of his lover's head and shutting his eyes. Both men started to cry quietly, for the pain and suffering Nigel had gone through but mostly for themselves.

To Be Continued....

---

(A/N: PICTURES! Please? I am eager to see more art from you all! Well, I've actually only received pictures inspired by Black' (mostly Sirius in his Goth getup), but I'd be pleased if anyone would draw me pictures from this story as well. Anything! Remmie as a teacher, Siri as a mechanic, even your own image of Nigel. Even if you want to draw stick figures of Siri stabbing Nigel, be my guest. And drawings inspired by Black' are always welcome, as well! I really mean it. I want to see some of your stuff! And no, I have no pride! I am not ashamed to beg! See? Please, please, PLEASE? -big puppy-dog eyes-)


	8. Emotions

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
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-The Haunted-  
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Chapter 8 - Emotions  
  
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Sirius sat by Remus' hospital bed, gazing unblinkingly at his lover's face as Remus slept the sleep of heavy sedatives. Nothing had been seriously wrong with Remus, but the doctors had insisted he stay in the hospital for a few days to have his burns treated, and for tests to be run on him to try and determine what, if any, side effects the drugs Nigel had been giving him might cause. The nurse had sedated Remus shortly after he had been brought in, simply because he couldn't stop weeping, no matter how hard Sirius tried to comfort him. Sirius brushed his husband's bangs off his forehead, looking sorrowfully down at a face troubled even in sleep. He didn't completely know what torture Remus had been through, but he was willing to bet it would be haunting his lover for a very long time.  
  
He glanced up at the clock. It was nearly nine PM; he remembered he had been expected at the Potters' for dinner. Heaving a sigh, he got up from his chair and headed for the pay telephone in the lobby. He dialed the Potters' number from memory, and waited.  
  
Hello, Potter residence, lady of the house speaking.  
  
I thought James told you to stop saying that, Sirius said, slightly amused.  
  
Sirius! Where _have_ you been? We thought you were coming for dinner!  
  
Sorry. I was a little busy. He swallowed. It's Remus.  
  
Oh, God. Lily suddenly sounded scared to death. He isn't - he's not -  
  
He's alive, Sirius said heavily. But that bastard did a lot to him. He's going to be scarred mentally as well as physically, you know, and... well... I don't know what else to tell you.  
  
Oh no, oh no, Lily whispered. What _happened_ to him?  
  
I can't tell you.... I mean, it's really his story to tell if he chooses. Listen, I've got to go. I don't have that much pence on me, and I still have others to ring. I just wanted you to know that Remmie's safe.  
  
Thank you, Lily said. I hope he's okay... I really do.  
  
Goodbye, Lily.  
  
Goodbye, Sirius.  
  
He hung up the phone, jingling the change in his pocket for a moment, then picked it up again. Hello, operator? I'd like to make a long distance call to Germany, if I may...  
  
---  
  
Twenty minutes later, Sirius returned to Remus' room, after ringing his mother, Remus' parents, and Bill at the garage. All expressed enormous relief and joy that Remus was safe, and asked endless questions. Sirius fended them off by saying he didn't know anything, except he had found Remus being held hostage and was able to get him away after the person responsible committed suicide. He didn't elaborate much; he didn't want his story to conflict with whatever the police would tell the papers.  
  
Remus was still sleeping. Sirius sat beside him, reaching out to touch the brunette's cheek. Last on his list had been Minerva McGonagall at the university. She had been just as relieved as the others; but just as Sirius had been about to hang up, she asked, rather hesitantly, when Remus would be returning to work. Sirius told her he hadn't the slightest idea; Remus had been through a terrible experience, and there was no telling how long it might take him to recover. Minerva had sounded quite disappointed as she said good-bye, but Sirius didn't care. Why should Remus be pressed into doing things he wasn't ready for? It was much too soon for him to return to teaching.  
  
He sighed again, shifting in his chair and closing his eyes. He was exhausted, but couldn't think of sleeping; he also needed a cigarette badly, but wouldn't leave Remus' side to have one. Horrible pictures played behind his closed eyelids as if he was looking at a cinema screen - the photographs, waking up to find Remus missing, Nigel's tears and anguished face, all mixed with both good and bad memories of his father. He wearily opened his eyes.  
  
It's not the time to rehash the past, he muttered to himself, rubbing his forehead.  
  
The door opened behind him. The doctor, a tall blonde man, entered. He smiled at Sirius. You look tired, Mr. Black. Perhaps you should head home for a rest.  
  
In a little while. What's going on?  
  
The doctor ruffled through his charts. The tests we did on the drugs in your lover's system matched the samples taken from the scene by the police. It's an unusual drug, a kind of highly concentrated morphine/sedative mix. None of our drug experts have seen it before, and we don't have anything quite like it in this hospital. We're checking with other hospitals around Britain, as well as hospitals in New York, Tokyo, Berlin, and Paris. I don't think we'll find any matches. There's a strong possibility that this drug was home-made.  
  
What about side effects?  
  
Ah. As we don't know much about the drug, it's hard to say what may come about in the long run. But for now, he should be fine. The only problem we foresee are possible withdrawal symptoms. Morphine and sedatives are, as you know, addictive, and Mr. Lupin-Black may suffer minor headaches, body aches, etc., as his body grows used to not receiving the drug. It's difficult to predict how bad they might be, or how long they'll last, but you should know it might happen.  
  
What about the other tests?  
  
It takes awhile to run tests on sexually-transmitted diseases, but for the moment it looks as if he's clean. He got off lucky in that area. And you'll be pleased to know that his burns should heal up very well. He'll have scars, of course, but they shouldn't be too bad.  
  
Sirius nodded as the doctor smiled pleasantly at him.   
  
You're welcome. I really must insist you go home and get some sleep, Mr. Black. You've been through a lot, as well.  
  
Yeah, I suppose, Sirius mumbled, as the doctor left the room. He got to his feet and kissed Remus lightly on the lips. I'll be back soon, love, he whispered.   
  
---  
  
At first when Remus awoke, he had no idea where he was. He felt groggy, and his arm hurt - for one panicked moment, he thought he was back in Nigel's house. But as he gazed around, he realised he was in a hospital. The grogginess was fading and the pain in his arm was only an IV needle. He was safe. Nigel was dead. There was nothing to fear now.  
  
The door opened and Sirius poked his head in. He smiled when he saw his lover was awake. Hi, Remmie.  
  
Hello, Siri. Remus smiled himself as Sirius entered, bearing a beautiful vase of flowers. He had obviously gotten some rest; he looked better than he had the day before, and had remembered to shave. They kissed, and Sirius set the flowers on the nightstand.  
  
How're you feeling?  
  
Hard to tell. Remus watched as Sirius tweaked one of the roses, which was leaning crookedly. I just woke up. I think I'm okay...  
  
The doctor says you should be fine. Every test on you he ran is good news. I talked to him again when I got here - you tested negative for most diseases, they're just waiting to see if you show any signs of the nasty ones that take a while to show up.  
  
That's good to know. Remus glanced up as a nurse entered, bearing breakfast. The toast was practically charred beyond recognition and the eggs were rubbery, but he began to eat them anyway. Did they say when I can go home?  
  
Definitely before the end of the week. But it's a good idea if you refrain from returning to work right away.  
  
Don't be silly, Remus said briskly, sipping at his pulpy orange juice. I'll be fine.  
  
Sirius frowned. Remmie... you've been through a lot. I think it's a good idea for you to stay home, too. Not forever, but just for a little while. You need rest.  
  
I'm getting plenty of rest right here as it were, Remus said cheerfully. I'll be fine.  
  
There was a long silence, in which Sirius gazed at Remus with worry on his face. He took his husband's hand. Who are you trying to convince, me or you?  
  
I don't understand you.  
  
You're not ready to go to work, Sirius said softly. You need to be at home for awhile, you understand? You've been raped. No one can possibly expect their lives to go completely back to normal after that.  
  
Thanks very much, Sirius, but I think I know what happened to me, Remus said harshly.  
  
Do you? You're trying to pretend everything is fine. It's not. You're going to have to learn to cope with it, you know. You have to get over it. There's no hiding from what's happened.  
  
No. There isn't. But that doesn't mean I have to dwell on the situation every minute of every day.  
  
But d'you think it'll really make it easier to ignore it when you've got your students asking questions and such? They're going to want to know what happened to you. Can you really concentrate on lessons like that?  
  
I - I still think you're being s-silly. Remus finished his eggs. Really, S-Sirius, I - He set down his fork and burst into a fresh storm of weeping, lowering his face into his hands. Sirius pushed the breakfast tray away and reached out to put his arms around his lover. Remus continued to cry, clinging to Sirius tightly.  
  
Why? Why me, Sirius? Why did he do this to me? he sobbed. I wish I never heard of Nigel Peasegood! I wish I'd never heard of Williams! Sometimes... sometimes I wish I'd never heard of any of them! I hate him, I hate him, I _hate_ him! I wish you'd killed him, Siri! I wish you'd tortured him and made him feel the pain he put me through! I wish he'd killed _me_, just so I don't have to l-live with this all m-my l-life!  
  
Oh, Remmie, no, Sirius whispered. No, no, no. I couldn't kill him, love. I promised you I wouldn't. There's nothing in the world that would make me break my promises to you. I _wanted_ to kill him after seeing what he had done to you... but I promised I would never kill anyone ever again, no matter what. I wish to God that Peasegood hadn't died, that he was in jail right now, at the mercy of some big burly murderer or something. But two wrongs don't make a right. Shouldn't it just be enough that he's dead and facing whatever punishment awaits him in the afterlife?  
  
I- suppose...  
  
Promise me you'll stay home, Sirius murmured. Stay with me, please. I want you home with me. It's too much for you to go back to school. Minerva will just have to keep your substitute on for awhile longer, but I don't want you away from me for a second. Not for anything. Until I'm sure you can handle it.  
  
Remus sniffled. It felt so good to be in Sirius' arms after such a long time apart. Deep inside, he knew his husband was right. He knew he couldn't face those staring eyes, those accusing glances. What would everyone think? That he had run off with another man without a word to his husband, that he had seduced Nigel on purpose and willingly had sex with him? In fact, how much did his students know? He didn't know what the papers had printed, so he couldn't be sure. All he knew for sure was that he wanted to stay safe by Sirius' side, forever.  
  
---  
  
It wasn't until Friday that Remus was allowed to leave the hospital. His burns were well along on the road to recovery, and he had thankfully tested negative for any sexually transmitted diseases. He was silent on the drive home, preferring to keep his eyes on his clasped hands rather than look out at the people on the sidewalks. Even with his head lowered, he felt he could sense their eyes boring into him, accusing him. He even felt as if disapproval was radiating from Sirius, though when he glanced timidly up at his lover Sirius gave him a warm smile. He swallowed hard and managed a weak smile in return before looking back at his fingers. He wished, for the hundredth time, that he had never stopped at that antiques shop, or had never spoken to Nigel. If he hadn't, he would most likely never have gotten into the whole mess in the first place. He would be at school right now, giving a lecture on the legends of King Arthur or discussing the Canterbury Tales with his students, eagerly awaiting returning home to eat supper with Sirius and perhaps make love on the living room sofa afterwards.  
  
He was quiet all day, only saying a few words and spending most of his time staring into space. Often, Sirius would be talking to him for several minutes before Remus realised he was doing so. He couldn't bring himself to watch the telly or read a book or do anything. He just wished he could close his eyes and sleep forever.  
  
Remus climbed into bed that night with some trepidations. When Sirius made to turn off the light, Remus grabbed his wrist. No, please! I - I want it on...  
  
Sirius looked perplexed, but merely turned the lamp to its lowest setting and slid under the sheets. He snuggled close to Remus and kissed his cheek. Goodnight, love.  
  
Remus replied automatically, obediently shutting his eyes. But he couldn't sleep. Every small noise made him start in terror, and eventually he stopped trying to sleep, instead laying awake and staring round his dimly-lit bedroom. Suddenly he felt strange, almost feverish; he pulled out of Sirius' arms. For some reason, he didn't want to be touched anymore. Leaving his lover in bed, he curled up in the armchair in the corner and shut his eyes, silent tears coursing down his cheeks.  
  
To Be Continued.  
  
---  
  
(A/N: Not really an author's note, more of a shameless plug. If anyone out there likes slightly naughty Sirius/Remus comedy, I suggest reading Some Enchanted Evening', written by myself and my cousin. We're known as Talim and Mina, and you can find a link to our profile on my profile page. Just a suggestion...  
  
Saw Prisoner of Azkaban for the third time the other day. It was even better than the first two times, though by now I was reciting lines along with the characters. I can't wait until it comes out on DVD. I'm going to ask for it for Christmas. I think I annoyed people by giggling and clapping and squealing, but somebody behind me had a stupid kid who kept crying for no good reason that I could see, so who cares. Felt like whacking the kid with my bag of jelly beans, but I would've had to take my eyes off the screen to do so. I'm really looking forward to the cut scenes on the DVD. Hopefully those will have Pigwidegeon in them, or at least explain who Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs were, or how Sirius and Remus knew how to work a map which (according to the movie) Harry, Fred, and George only knew how to work. And did anyone notice they spelled Moony as Mooney' on the Marauder's Map?)


	9. Pain

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 9 - Pain  
  
---  
  
The next morning was dull and rainy, everything seeming to be the same drab shade of grey. The weather exactly matched the way Remus felt as he sat gloomily on the sofa, his undrunk mug of tea clenched between his hands. The melancholy weather was only making him feel worse, however. He hadn't gotten any sleep at all last night, but had spent the night in the armchair, trying his best not to think of anything in particular but unable to keep from remembering the events of the past weeks. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't look up as Sirius entered the room, until he felt a hand on his forehead.  
  
Remmie? Are you okay? D'you feel ill? Sirius asked softly. You look a little peaky. Maybe you should go back to bed...  
  
Remus only nodded, letting Sirius take the cup of tea away. He shied away when Sirius reached for his hand to help him up. Ignoring the hurt that appeared in his lover's eyes, he trudged slowly back up to their bedroom. He didn't want to sleep, but if Sirius was going to hand him an excuse to be alone, he wasn't going to refuse. He wanted to be alone. He didn't think he could take much more of Sirius' concern and pity. He knew his husband was trying hard to make him feel better, but found he didn't care. A part of him was shocked at this revelation, but he didn't care about that, either. All Remus wanted was to be left alone forever, with no one to talk to him or touch him. He never wanted to be touched again. He curled up in the middle of the bed, pulling the blankets up to his nose.  
  
Every moment since he awoke in the hospital had been agony. Somehow, he hurt even worse now than he ever had with Nigel. The one thought that kept returning to him was that he could never let anyone touch him ever again. If they touched him, they would hurt him. He had learned that much from being inside that monster's house. He _did_ know Sirius would never hurt him, but he didn't want his husband to touch him either. He wasn't the same Remus Sirius loved. He had been degraded, dirtied, damaged. _How_ could Sirius possibly love him after this? Even if he hadn't been infected with some nasty, hidden disease, Remus was sure his husband must be sickened with the idea that he had to spend the rest of his life sleeping beside the man who had betrayed him. He almost wished he _did_ have a disease, one that would kill him quickly and put him out of his misery.  
  
The bedroom door creaked open, and Remus shut his eyes and pretended to be asleep. Sirius' voice called softly. Remus didn't move, just kept his eyes firmly shut and continued to breathe slowly and deeply. It seemed to him as if Sirius stood in that doorway forever, staring at him, and Remus felt an almost unbearable urge to scream. Just as he was on the verge of jumping out of bed and running into Sirius' arms, the door clicked shut and his lover's footsteps faded away. Remus opened his eyes and drew a deep, shuddery breath. He berated himself silently for his moment of weakness. It would be better for them both this way.  
  
But somehow, a part of him (the same part that was shocked at his lack of gratitude towards Sirius) knew it was all a big lie. He _needed_ Sirius, needed to be touched and held and kissed. He needed the love his husband could give him, needed the help Sirius could offer him to begin to get over his rape. He shut his eyes again, trying to ignore the tears that streamed down his cheeks. Why was he just lying here, acting like a sulky child? He let out a small whimper, almost hoping Sirius would hear and come upstairs to comfort him. But he knew it was impossible for Sirius to hear him all the way from the kitchen. Though he longed for comfort, something still held him back, kept him from crying out Sirius' name and running into his arms. Finally, he fell asleep for real, his pillowcase damp with tears.  
  
---  
  
Remus woke up abruptly when Sirius got into bed. He realised he had slept through the whole day, a quick glance at the alarm clock telling him that it was now eleven PM. He blinked rapidly and shifted slightly.  
  
Sorry - did I wake you? Sirius' voice was instantly concerned. His hand rested on Remus' forehead briefly. You're not hot. He brushed his lover's bangs away from his forehead, and Remus' heart ached with pain and loneliness. He longed to be in Sirius' arms again, but he also didn't want Sirius to touch him. He reached up and pushed Sirius' hand away.  
  
Sirius drew back, injured. He couldn't understand what was wrong. After everything they had been through, all he wanted was to hold Remus and never let him go. He had thought his husband had wanted the same thing; but he had avoided Sirius' touch ever since returning from the hospital. It was a thousand times worse than anything Nigel could have done to them. Having Remus pull away from him was the most painful thing he'd experienced yet. Remmie - what's wrong? Why won't you let me touch you?  
  
Remus didn't answer. He rolled over, keeping his back to his lover in attempt to discourage conversation, but Sirius Black was not a quitter.  
  
You've been avoiding me since you got home. You haven't said a word, and you're not eating. I'm _worried_ about you. You're much too thin, and... I miss hugging you. I miss touching you. I know you didn't stay in bed with me last night. What is it, love? Why are you doing this? Why won't you tell me what's wrong?  
  
Remus fought back tears as Sirius talked, but it was no use. He knew Sirius truly cared. But he couldn't... he couldn't...  
  
You can't! he cried, cutting Sirius off. You can't touch me! I was with another man! I as good as cheated on you, even though I was forced! He raped me, he hurt me - he's ruined me and infected me, I can't let you touch me and contaminate yourself! You have every right to hate me! He may have forced me, but I didn't do much to stop him, now did I? Tears poured down his cheeks. I don't want to be touched! By you, by anyone! I... I don't deserve it. I don't deserve being loved by you after... after what I did.  
  
There was a long silence, during which Remus cried helplessly into his cupped hands. As his tears subsided, his hands were pulled away and Sirius caught his chin roughly between his thumb and forefinger, forcing Remus to look at him. Startled, Remus saw that Sirius had tears in his eyes as well.  
  
Listen to me, Remus. Listen good. This is not - your - fault. No matter what happened to you, none of it was your fault. Peasegood was a sick, twisted bloke. You did your best to stop him, but what could you do? You were tied up and drugged. He beat you to get you to do what he wanted. You couldn't have stopped him, my love. You have to realise that you're not to blame here. Do you hear me?  
  
Remus looked into Sirius' dark eyes.  
  
Don't you ever tell me you don't deserve to be loved. You do, Remmie. Remember when I thought the same thing, and you set me straight? Maybe I am a murderer, but I still deserve love. And maybe you were hurt by a horrible man, but you deserve love, too. And there's nothing you can say or do that would make me turn my back on you after so long. I love you. I'll always love you. And I want to help you, Remmie. I want to help you get through this. I want to see you smile again. I want to hear you laugh. I want to see you _happy_. But how can I do that if you're not going to let me?  
  
Siri - Remus swallowed hard, then leaned against Sirius and put his arms around his lover. Sirius hugged him back tightly, as his lover whimpered slightly. It felt so _good_ to be in Sirius' arms. Who had he been kidding? Sirius wouldn't hurt him. Sirius loved him more than anything. And he was right. It was silly to think that way. He allowed himself to be pulled back onto the bed, snuggling against Sirius as his husband pulled up the blankets and wrapped his arms around him. I love you.  
  
I love you, too. So much, Sirius murmured.  
  
I'm sorry. I've been so... so stupid, Remus whispered.  
  
_No_. Not at all. Sirius kissed his forehead. I can't blame you for being scared, or for feeling it was your fault. Anyone would have felt that way under the same circumstances, even me. At first, I did think you'd run off with another man, but it didn't take me long to realise that you'd never do something like that. I know you'd never leave me for anyone. It wasn't like cheating on me at all. Cheating is done willingly. He forced you into it. Please, love, stop blaming yourself! You couldn't have helped it! How were you to know that you'd meet up with some lunatic on your Sunday walk? How were you to know he'd take you home and drug you to keep you under his command? You couldn't. It was just a series of unfortunate events - it's time to stop blaming yourself. You have to _see_, Remmie. This was all the fault of a maniac who was hell bent on revenge.  
  
I know. Remus pressed his face against Sirius' chest, his tears wetting the front of the old t-shirt his lover wore. I know. I'll... I'll try. I have to try. I need to get better. I - I - he swallowed hard, then looked up at Sirius. I want to see you happy again, too. I know you can't be happy unless I am too. I want to be able to go outside without having to be afraid of everyone, and I want to stop shrinking from anyone who gives me a hello'. I want to be able to see James and Lily and Harry again... I want to go back to my students. He sniffled. But I... can't do it just yet... I need... I need help, Siri. Perhaps even professional help. I don't know what to do now. I need someone to help me.  
  
I'll help you, Sirius murmured. I'll help you. I'll be more than happy to bring you to a doctor, but first you have to get over your fear of ordinary people. It won't help if you can't talk to strangers, you know.  
  
Thank you, Remus whispered. Sirius kissed him gently, his hand reaching for the lamp. Remus' stomach fluttered with panic, and Sirius saw the look in his eyes. He turned the lamp down to the lowest setting instead of shutting it off, then settled back down.  
  
Goodnight, Remmie.  
  
Goodnight, Siri. Remus lay still in his husband's arms, watching him as he fell asleep. He thought he would be up all night, but the emotional strain he had just gone through had tired him out. He shut his eyes, trembling, waiting for the nightmares to begin. But somehow, miraculously, he fell asleep almost instantly. And tonight, when he lay in Sirius' arms, knowing he was innocent and that his husband's love had not waned, there were no nightmares. Not one.  
  
---  
  
The next day was just as cloudy and grey as the previous one. Both Remus and Sirius slept later than usual, but rose feeling more refreshed than they had in quite awhile. As Remus sat at the table, slowly eating his sausage and kippers, the doorbell rang. Sirius hurried to answer it, and when he returned, Lily was at his side, looking very pretty in a pink dress and matching hat. She looked worried to death; when she saw Remus, her eyes filled with tears and she started forward to hug him, but apparently changed her mind halfway there. She bit her lip, looking uncertain, her emerald eyes flickering to Sirius, who nodded for her to sit down as he poured her a cup of coffee.  
  
Good morning, Remus, Lily said quietly, sinking into her chair. Are - how are you doing?  
  
She looked so genuinely concerned, Remus couldn't bear to lie to her. Awful, but better than I was yesterday, he said softly.  
  
Seemingly without knowing what she was doing, Lily reached for his hand; Remus flinched, and she quickly pulled away. Instead, she cupped her hands around the steaming mug of coffee Sirius had just set in front of her. There was silence for a few minutes, before Lily spoke again.  
  
We're so worried, Remus. I didn't think you'd want too many of us here, so I begged James to stay with Harry while I came to visit - but we're all going spare, Grace is nearly frantic with worry - and your mother... Her eyes were pleading. You have to get better soon, Remus. We miss you. We want you to get better. I don't like seeing you so upset. She sipped glumly at her coffee. I hate him. she said flatly. The man who did this to you. I hope he burns in hell. I hope someone down there beats him and rapes him and does everything to him that he did to you. So he'd know _exactly_ how it feels.  
  
Remus turned white at those words, memories crowding in on him like images on a nightmarish roll of film, and pushed away his mostly-uneaten breakfast. Lily noticed at once, and looked instantly mortified. Oh - Remus, I've upset you - oh, I'm so sorry -  
  
It's okay, Lily, Remus said; but it was far from okay. He could feel a headache coming on, and for the millionth time in a week he was on the verge of tears. It's... I'm going to go lie down... thank you for visiting, Lily....  
  
Lily looked crushed as Remus departed; as soon as the bedroom door shut upstairs she turned to Sirius. I upset him, she said. When I said I hoped that man goes through the same thing in hell. Tears spilled down her cheeks; she rummaged around in her purse for a hanky, dabbing at the mascara dribbling down her face. I can't believe I was that stupid! she cried. I'm so stupid! Why couldn't I have kept my big mouth shut?  
  
Shh, it's okay, Lily, Sirius said, putting a comforting arm around her. It's okay, it'll be fine - I'll talk to him. He knows you didn't mean to say it like that, or so suddenly. He's just... he's been through a lot. He's going to be upset by this for a very long time, you see? But trust me. He'll never hate you for saying anything. Don't feel bad. We need your help. James' and Grace's too. Everybody's. But it's too early to make him relive what he went through.  
  
You're right, Lily whispered. I shouldn't have said anything until he was ready to talk about it himself...  
  
It takes awhile, Sirius said. I was the same way when I was younger. I never wanted to tell anyone what my father did to me and Mum and Regulus. But once I opened up to Remus, he made me see that no one can go through something like that alone. Talking about it helps. But the person who needs to talk first has to see that, and understand that talking can help the healing process. He pulled a hanky from his own pocket and gently wiped away Lily's smudged makeup. Now, come on. Smile for me. Remmie and I need all the cheering up we can get.  
  
She sniffled, but managed a watery smile. Sirius smiled back and kissed her forehead. Much better. He escorted her to the door, Lily straightening her hat and dabbing anxiously at her puffy eyes. Remember what I said, okay? he asked her, as she got into her car.  
  
I will. And Sirius... tell - tell Remus I'm sorry.  
  
Of course.  
  
She started the engine.  
  
  
  
She looked up at him. Sirius smiled once more. Thank you. It's always good to know we've got friends when we need them the most.  
  
Her smile was warmer this time. You're welcome. Goodbye, Sirius.  
  
Goodbye, Lily. He watched as her little Volkswagen beetle pulled away from the curb, then headed back inside. Ignoring the clutter of breakfast dishes still on the table, he headed upstairs to talk to Remus.  
  
His mate was sitting on the bed, hugging a pillow to his chest. His eyes were red as he looked up at Sirius. I'm sorry, love.  
  
For what? Sirius closed the door behind him and sat down beside Remus.  
  
I was rude to Lily, Remus sighed. She was only trying to make me feel better, I know that. But... the things she said... just made me remember what Nigel did to me. I... I just want to forget, Siri... but it was no excuse to be rude. I love Lily very much, and I feel awful...  
  
Sirius put an arm around him. Not at all, Remmie. Lil thought she was rude to _you_. She said she was sorry. I told her it was okay. Don't feel bad. Neither of you were at fault. It was just a slip of the tongue at the wrong time. He kissed Remus' neck. Come on. Smile for me. Just once?  
  
Remus sighed and leaned into Sirius' embrace, taking a few deep breaths before managing a small smile for his husband.  
  
Much better. Sirius pulled him close and kissed him softly. Remus had almost forgotten what it had felt like to be held so tenderly and treated so gently. He put his arms around Sirius' neck and kissed back, running his fingers through Sirius' long, silky hair.  
  
Sirius' fingers paused at the buttons of Remus' shirt. Is it okay?  
  
It was. It was nothing like being with Nigel. Sirius took his time, anxiously telling Remus to let him know the instant he became scared or uncomfortable. It was enough to bring tears to his eyes the way Sirius went so slowly, so carefully. He had dreaded sex ever since waking up in the hospital, fearing that it would be like reliving the rapes. But it was entirely different, and Remus had faint hope that everything would be all right. He returned Sirius' kisses eagerly, almost hungrily. He had missed making love with Sirius, even more so after being raped, after seeing how brutal sex could be and realising how gentle Sirius had always been with him.  
  
But it hurt when Sirius tried to enter him - sharp pain even worse than his very first time, and he cried out. Sirius froze, instantly worried.  
  
  
  
I'm - I'm sorry, Siri, Remus managed. It... it hurts too much...  
  
Sirius stopped right away, sitting back on his heels and looking doubly concerned. The mood was ruined, but neither man cared. Faint anger lines crossed Sirius' forehead. It's because of him, isn't it? he said softly. Oh, Remmie... His fingers caressed his husband's cheek. I hate him, he said. He's hurt you so badly. He laid down beside Remus once more, snuggling close and wrapping a blanket around their bodies. Bloody bastard. I don't care what happened in his past, I swear I'll hate him forever.  
  
It's... it's not bad, Remus tried to reassure him. I'll be okay, I think I just need a while to get better. I-  
  
Dammit, Remmie, it's not the sex, Sirius said impatiently. If I couldn't have sex with you again, I wouldn't care. I'm just happy to have you back, alive. Sex doesn't matter. It's just - just the idea - of what he'd have to do to- to make it hurt that badly - for this long - he sighed. I suppose it's no use getting mad. Let's just... let's just take a nap, okay?  
  
Remus was warm and comfortable in Sirius' arms and had no wish to leave; he closed his eyes and was asleep in seconds. His husband, however, was busy thinking.  
  
I think it's time I paid someone a visit, he said softly.  
  
---  
  
Lily came to visit the next morning, bringing along baby Harry. The baby seemed to lift Remus' spirits immensely; it was hard to remain gloomy when Harry kept insisting that Remus and his mother colour with him, or help him line up his extensive collection of toy cars.  
  
Uncle Siri, come play too! Harry called from the floor, where he sat amidst a sea of blocks that Remus kept especially for whenever the child came to visit.  
  
Maybe later, Harry, Sirius smiled. I've got to run an errand. He looked at Remus. Is that okay?  
  
Remus nodded. O-of course. He didn't really want Sirius to leave, but he also didn't want Lily to get upset or worried over him.  
  
Sirius understood. I won't be long, he promised, kissing Remus on the forehead and shrugging into his old leather jacket. Love you.  
  
Love you too. Remus watched his husband headed down the path and climbed into the car; he backed out of the drive and was gone. Remus remained at the window for a few minutes, biting his lip and trying to ignore the faint flutters of panic in his belly. He would be fine. Lily and Harry were here. Sirius would be right back. There was nothing to be afraid of.  
  
---  
  
Sirius lit a cigarette, heading down the narrow gravel path, his eyes flickering from side to side as he looked for what he had come for. He finally found it, tucked away in a reclusive corner. Nigel's grave, the tombstone brand-new and gleaming, the dirt on top still fresh and crumbly. For a very long time, Sirius stood there, chain-smoking and staring at the grave. Then, he sighed and sank to the ground, sitting cross-legged at the foot of the grave.  
  
he said softly. I don't care what happened to you. You had the chance to get away from him and make it right. You could have cut ties with him and begun to heal from what he did to you. But instead, you chose to brood on revenge, and take it out on an innocent person. No, you're more than just a bastard. You're a coward, as well. Only a coward would take the easy way out. Instead of paying for harming Remus and learning to live with yourself, you killed yourself. It was a cowardly thing to do. He lit another cigarette, grinding the old fag out on the ground. Some people would say I goaded you into doing it. But believe me, the last thing I wanted was your blood on my hands. _You_ chose to pull that trigger. You could have just as easily dropped the gun, or shot me instead. You could have killed me and gotten your revenge, even if you did go to jail for it. But you didn't. I wish I knew why.  
  
There was no answer but the sound of the wind in the trees and the far-off sound of a mourning dove; but Sirius hadn't really expected one. Thanks to you, Remus might never be the same. No, correction. He never _will_ be the same. You've hurt him so badly. Even after he heals up physically, there'll be the mental scars to deal with. And those don't fade so easily. But I guess you already knew that, right?  
  
Still no answer. Sirius wished _something_ would happen. A sign, an omen, something to tell him he was right all along. An answer from _somebody_.  
  
He heard footsteps crunching on the path behind him, and he stood up quickly. It was a man and woman, both wearing black. The woman had brilliant green eyes and short brown hair that was going grey. With a jolt, Sirius realised exactly who they were.  
  
Mr. Peasegood said. You're visiting my son?  
  
Sirius put out his cigarette, bending hastily to pick up the butt.  
  
The woman smiled, but her eyes were filled with tears behind the black veil she wore. Are you one of Nigel's friends?  
  
Sirius couldn't bear to tell the poor woman the truth. He wondered if the Peasegoods knew anything about their son's death. I knew him, yes. It wasn't exactly the same thing, but the Peasegoods didn't seem to notice. They moved a little closer to the grave, Mr. Peasegood's arm wrapped tightly around his wife's shoulders. She gave a hearty sniff, raising her veil a tad to dab at her eyes with a black hanky. Sirius averted his eyes respectfully, and turned to go.  
  
He didn't know what he had been expecting, visiting Nigel's grave like that. Somehow, it was even harder to hate Nigel now that he knew the man had parents who loved him and cared for him. Sirius sighed as he climbed into the car. He put the key in the ignition, but didn't start it. He had been hoping, actually, to get a little angry - scream at Nigel, curse him, tell him how much he hated him - but it was somehow hard to do. No matter how awful the man had been, he still had family who cared for him. He had done terrible things to Remus, and yet Sirius couldn't hate him outright. Why?  
  
Goddammit, why? Sirius cried, hitting the steering wheel before lowering his head onto his arms and breaking into tears.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
---  
  
(A/N: I know I could have ended this story happily with the death of Nigel, but I didn't. I decided it was important to show Remus recovering from being raped, and how his friends and family try to help him. I'm no expert in the area, but I'm going to give it my best shot. In my opinion, you can't just have someone raped and end the story there. The healing process is important. There's no way Remus could have just waltzed in to school the day after getting out of the hospital and start teaching right away! And it looks like Sirius might have some issues to deal with, as well. So, please stick around a little longer, even if I start getting boring.  
  
Also, someone mentioned a plot hole. I said in the last chapter that Remus had been found clean of all sexually transmitted diseases, but this person pointed out that AIDS takes a long, long time to show up. My only defense is that I am forgetful and scatterbrained. I meant to say something along the lines of Remus was found free of most of the immediate diseases', but forgot. So, sorry. Blame my scrambled brains.)


	10. Recovery

**Disclaimer, Warnings, Etc.** - Please see the first chapter for those.  
  
---  
-The Haunted-  
---  
  
Chapter 10 - Recovery  
  
---  
  
It was almost three hours before Sirius returned from running his errand. He wouldn't say what it was, though he had thoughtfully brought back a nightlight for Remus. It didn't take three hours to purchase a nightlight, but Remus let the excuse slide for the moment. After everything Sirius had said the other night, he wouldn't dream of suspecting that Sirius was cheating on him or doing anything else particularly awful. He _did _ notice that his husband's eyes were rather red, but didn't bring it up in front of Lily and Harry. But as soon as the pair had departed, waving cheerfully from the window of Lily's Beetle, Remus reached for Sirius' hand.  
  
Love? Is something wrong?  
  
Sirius lit a cigarette, staring glumly out at the drizzly grey sky. Wrong? What could possibly be wrong?  
  
You're acting odd, Remus said softly. Where did you go today? Did you see something that upset you?  
  
No, I'm fine.  
  
Siri... come on. I know you're upset.  
  
It wasn't any use to play innocent, Sirius thought with a mental sigh. Remus always knew when something was up. He squeezed Remus' hand and tapped his fag over the ashtray. I went to... to visit Nigel's grave today, Remmie. I wanted to... I don't know. I wanted to scream my head off, spit on his grave, curse his name into the seventieth generation. I wanted _something_ , some sort of closure. But then... his - his parents showed up. His mum and dad... they were nice to me, but I could tell they were heartbroken. And for some reason, I... I couldn't hate him as much, knowing he had parents who still cared for him, and missed him. I don't know how much they know about how he died, or anything. But when I saw them... saw his mother crying... It was just... I don't know. He looked down at his and Remus' interlocked fingers. It made me think of Williams and O'Shea. I'm sure _their_ parents went through the same thing after - after I killed their sons.  
  
Oh, Siri -  
  
It just made me wonder... where it all ends, Sirius continued dully. It's been an endless cycle of doing wrongs in an attempt to make a right. No matter what anybody does, it just seems like we're still in the wrong. More people keep getting hurt. I just... I just want it to end. I'll never be able to forget what I did... we'll never be able to forget what happened to you. But I wish... it would just stop _hurting_....  
  
The cigarette butt tumbled into the ashtray as Sirius' fingers began trembling uncontrollably. Remus drew him into his arms, stroking his long hair and trying to soothe him. Siri.... Nigel's death wasn't your fault. He wasn't right in the head. He hadn't been for a very long time. I think... I think he was past all help... you can't blame yourself for that.  
  
I killed Williams, Sirius whispered.  
  
Even if you hadn't, he would have kept up what he was doing until Nigel either died or lost his mind, or killed Williams himself, Remus said simply. It was odd to be taking charge like this, and he suddenly felt as if his and Sirius' roles were reversed. Now it was Sirius who depended on him for reassurance and comfort and love; Remus couldn't back down now. He kissed his lover's forehead. I know it hurts, he murmured. But we can't change the past, no matter what. We have to learn... to learn how to get over this. Together.  
  
His mate's tears dripped onto his shoulder. Silence reigned for awhile, then Sirius sat up, drying his eyes on his sleeve. You're right, Remmie. It's going to take a lot of courage on _both_ our parts. He fished his pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. And I'm going to start by giving up these - again, that is. He tossed the pack over Remus' head and into the wastebasket in the corner.  
  
Remus said softly. And I... I think I should go to a doctor. You've done a wonderful job helping me so far, and I love you so much for it.... but talking about it will help. I mean, talking about it with a professional.... It won't be the same as talking it over with you, but I'll still have you there for support... and a doctor can show me - _us_ - how to get through this.  
  
All right. Sirius leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. Anything you want, my dear.  
  
Remus traced Sirius' jaw with his finger.  
  
His husband nuzzled his neck.  
  
Then I also want to make love, Remus whispered, putting his arms around his lover's neck and pulling him back onto the couch. Right now.  
  
I haven't heard you be that demanding for a long time, Sirius smirked. Since we were eighteen or so...  
  
Be quiet. Just kiss me, okay?  
  
---  
  
A week later, after researching articles and going to the library for information on doctors, Remus began seeing a psychiatrist who specialized in helping rape victims. Her name was Dr. Wu, and she was an extremely attentive and kind woman. Remus found himself opening up to her in a way he had never experienced with anyone but Sirius- confessing all the fears that had plagued him since he had come out of his drug-induced haze to find himself in Nigel's house. At times, the memories were so painful that he wept as he talked, and once or twice he cried so hard Dr. Wu had to bring Sirius in to help comfort him. The therapy was like ripping open an old wound, but somehow, vaguely, Remus felt better after each session, as though opening the wound was allowing some noxious poison to finally leak out. Sirius was not allowed to sit in on Remus' sessions with Dr. Wu, but instead sat patiently in the waiting room pursuing old magazines until Remus was ready to leave. Once they returned home, Remus was treated to all the hugs and kisses he could want, his pain diminishing in his lover's warm embrace.  
  
It was just a small step in the healing process, Remus knew. It could take years before he was finally as good as new; he certainly couldn't go back to the way he had been before being kidnapped, but he was going to try his hardest to come as close as possible. He began forcing himself into social situations - always with his husband by his side, just in case - small things at first, like going to the shops or to the library. The first time he left the house was truly awful; as soon as he laid eyes on the crowd of people at the market, he broke out in a cold sweat and had to stay in the car for almost twenty minutes before he could proceed. But it was like anything else - the more he tried, the sooner he would improve.  
  
Two weeks after beginning therapy, Remus and Sirius were able to return to making love - slowly, carefully, as if they were starting for the first time. It would have melted anyone's heart to see the gentle, cautious way Sirius handled the issue, trying his very best to make everything good for Remus and ignoring his own pleasure, always reminding his husband to let him know the minute it began to hurt, or brought back memories of Nigel. Afterwards, they would lay in each other's arms and talk for hours, cherishing their time together in a way they never had before. It was all too easy to remember how simply their life had fallen apart, and both men were determined to make better use of their time together.  
  
It was amazing what was happening to them. By the time the first snow fell, Remus was smiling once more. He had by no means forgotten what he had been through, but Dr. Wu was helping him to cope with it better. She had insisted he sit in with some group therapy sessions for victims of rape; it was a thought that had paralyzed Remus at first (the idea of reliving his experiences with a group of complete strangers was not a welcome one), and he had been doubly nervous upon seeing that he was the only man present; but after a few visits Remus began to relax, and he tried his best to comfort and encourage the other members of the group. Of course, it wasn't all easy; sometimes Remus would suddenly break out in a cold sweat in the middle of the market or at a church bazaar, wondering what he was doing in the midst of a seething mass of people, any of whom might be sadistic weirdos like Nigel. He would have to close his eyes and count to ten, a trick learned from Dr. Wu, until he felt better. Sirius had finally returned to work, and was slowly beginning to keep his guilt under control again. It wasn't easy; for a long time his nightmares persisted - some nights he awoke crying and begging his father not to hurt him, or begging Nigel to put down the pistol.  
  
It would be hard for him to deal with Nigel's death the way he had after Williams' and O'Shea's. He couldn't even remember the exact moment he had killed either boy; all he could remember was what had happened immediately before and after the killings. But he had been perfectly lucid when Nigel committed suicide; no one could have witnessed something like that without losing sleep. He flat-out refused to talk to Dr. Wu about it, telling Remus that he couldn't tell anyone without bringing up what had happened to Williams, O'Shea, and his father. He instead put all his energies into work and helping Remus, knowing that a day of hard work tired him out enough that he slept deeply enough to keep the nightmares away.  
  
But he was still bothered by a lingering feeling of something unfinished. There was one last thing that had to be taken care of, though. One very important matter.  
  
Sirius waited until one night when Remus fell into a particularly deep sleep (courtesy of a sleeping pill slipped into his tea; Sirius felt guilty about doing it, but he couldn't risk Remus waking up until he was finished with what he had to do), then rummaged around in a drawer in the wardrobe and pulled out a slew of coloured photographs from their hiding place behind his socks. He headed downstairs and hunted in the kitchen cupboards for a bottle of lighter fluid and a pack of matches before going outdoors.  
  
In the back garden was a large stone fireplace, which the previous owners of the house had used for burning leaves. Sirius stopped in front of it, tossing a handful of dry twigs into the fireplace. A squirt of lighter fluid, a flicker of flame, and a small fire bloomed in the fireplace. He waited until the flames grew higher, then glanced down at the photographs in his hand. His jaw tightened as he looked at the horrific pictures, testament to the suffering Remus had been through. Finally, he tossed the pictures into the heart of the fire, watching as the flames licked greedily at them, making the photographs bubble and brown. It was a long time before he put out the flames and buried the ashes under several inches of damp dirt from the flowerbeds.  
  
---  
  
  
  
Several grey, snowy days after Sirius had burned the humiliating photographs of him, Remus stood before his lover with an uncharacteristically nervous look on his face. He was fiddling with the collar of his jumper, biting his lip. Sirius raised an eyebrow, looking up at Remus over the rim of his coffee cup. What is it, love?  
  
I... I have to do something, Remus said hesitantly. I need... it's something I really think I should do.  
  
Well? What is it?  
  
I... I want to visit Nigel's grave, Remus said softly. Seeing the surprised look on Sirius' face, he continued, I - I just think I should go. It might... it might help me... I don't know how to explain it, I... I just think... please, don't be angry, I just -  
  
I'm not angry. Sirius put down his mug and stood to pull Remus into his arms. Why should I be angry? I'm just a little worried... are you sure you want to do this? It might be painful for you.  
  
It _will_ be painful, Remus said firmly. But I... I have to do it. Even if it's just for a moment. Please, Siri?  
  
There was a long silence, and then his husband sighed deeply. He kissed Remus' forehead. All right, he said quietly. All right. I'll bring you there.  
  
So that was how Remus found himself at a graveyard forty minutes later, getting out of the car in the parking lot. He shivered and pulled on his gloves, turning to his husband, who was beginning to get out of the car. No, love.  
  
  
  
I need to go alone, Remus said. Stay here... I won't be gone long. I promise.  
  
It was evident from the look on his face that Sirius didn't think much of this arrangement; and to be honest Remus would rather have had his mate with him. But Sirius didn't protest. He just shrugged, taking Remus' gloved hand and kissing it before swinging his legs back into the car and reaching over to turn the heat up higher. Okay, Remmie... if you say so... I'll be waiting, okay?  
  
Remus turned away and headed down the neatly shoveled and salted path, pulling his scarf up a tad in an attempt to keep his nose warm. After nearly fifteen minutes of slogging through the snow between the gravestones, he found Nigel's grave, located in a remote corner in the farthest edge of the graveyard. The tombstone was still new and gleaming, ice and snow embedded in the gashes spelling out Nigel's name. Remus stood and looked for a long time, paying no heed to the cold or how violently he was shivering. He wished he could think of something to say, anything. It was hard to know how to feel about Nigel's death. He was obviously relieved that he was no longer a madman's captive, and he hated the man for raping and hurting him, but to know how tortured Nigel himself had been inside....  
  
Someone came up behind him, their boots crunching in the snow. He turned to see a haggard-looking woman, dressed from head to toe in black, approaching. Her short hair was mostly grey, her green eyes dull and faded. But the resemblance was there. She had to be Nigel's mother. Sirius would not have recognised her straightaway; she looked several years older than she had when she and Sirius had met. She was carrying a small bouquet of pine branches and bright holly berries, tied with a big red ribbon.  
  
She smiled up at Remus. He felt a pang of sympathy for her. He could only imagine what it was like for her, trying to cope with the death of her son. He stepped aside, allowing her to draw closer to the grave and lay the pine branches at the foot of the tombstone. She turned to him, studying his face. You're that poor boy my son kidnapped, aren't you? she asked.  
  
When Remus didn't answer right away, she shook her head. There's no need to worry. The police already told me what... what our Nigel did. She stepped closer, one leather-gloved hand reaching up to touch Remus' cheek. I can't tell you how sorry I am, she whispered. When I heard, I... I was in shock. I loved my son. But I am truly sorry for what happened to you. If I had known... I wish I had noticed what was wrong with him. He's been so different since that Williams boy died. Our Nigel never really got over it... at the time I just thought he was shaken up over the lad's death, but he never got any better....I never thought it would drive him to hurt another person...  
  
Remus took Mrs. Peasegood's hand in both of his, trying to give her a reassuring smile. Don't blame yourself, ma'am. Nigel was... well, he seemed like he didn't want help. He... I thought he tried so hard to act normally... you couldn't have seen anything wrong with him. He squeezed her hand gently. I'm sorry that your son is dead, he said quietly. I never... I never would have wished him to die, no matter what he did to me. I would have wanted him to get the help he needed. He reached into his pocket and held his hanky out to Mrs. Peasegood, who dabbed at her tearing eyes with it.  
  
You're a wonderful lad, she said. It still doesn't excuse what our Nigel did to you. But a mother loves her son, no matter what... I wish we could have gotten him help, too. She handed back the hanky, giving Remus a watery smile. I wish everyone was as forgiving and understanding as you, Mr. Lupin-Black.  
  
Thank you. They stood there in silence for awhile longer, staring at the grave, until Remus noticed that Mrs. Peasegood was shivering, her nose and cheeks very red. He gently led her away from the grave, back to the parking lot, where a long, gleaming black car waited for her at the curb, its motor idling. She hugged him before getting into the car, then unrolled the window to speak to him.  
  
You're a sweet man, Mr. Lupin-Black. I wish you luck.  
  
Thank you, Remus said softly. I wish you luck as well, ma'am.  
  
She smiled at him and rolled up the window. The black car pulled away from the curb, and Remus watched it until it was out of sight, feeling somehow better than he had in quite awhile. Then he crossed the lot and slid into the car. Sirius was listening to the radio, but turned it down when Remus got in. All right, love?  
  
Remus kissed his cheek. Perfectly fine, darling. Let's go home.  
  
---  
  
By the time March rolled around, Remus felt he was ready to return to teaching. He was feeling much better lately, due in part to his therapy and Sirius' constant devotion and support; but somehow, he secretly felt his encounter with Mrs. Peasegood had gone a long way towards making him feel better.  
  
Sirius didn't protest Remus' decision to return to work. Remus got notes and schedules regarding his classes' progress from Minerva, and spent his evenings going over every lesson and making up his mind on where to pick up. The night before his return, he felt very nervous; but it was a fluttery, excited kind of nervous. He had missed his work and his students very much, and couldn't wait to return. The feeling of nervousness persisted the next morning as Remus showered, dressed, and ate breakfast; what would his colleagues or students say on his return? The worst details of his disappearance had been kept out of the papers at Burns' request, but there was no telling what anyone might think.  
  
Those thoughts played in his mind as he drove to the university, and for a moment his throat closed as he imagined the staring eyes of hundreds of people waiting for him at school. He gave his head a quick shake, pulling into his parking space and getting out of the car, going round to the boot to fetch his briefcase, books, and files. The stone steps of the university gleamed wetly in the weak sunshine as he climbed them; the front doors creaked loudly as he pushed them open. He was slightly late; the halls were empty, and his footsteps clicked loudly on the marble floor. He came to a halt outside the door of his classroom, hearing the buzzing of voices as his students chattered away; he shifted his books slightly in his arms, reaching for the cold knob.  
  
For a moment, he froze, his hand on the doorknob. He wasn't seeing the familiar door of his classroom; he was miles away, staring at a heavy front door with locks on it as he was being dragged away by his ankle. His breath grew ragged. He was back in Nigel's house, weeping as Nigel had his way with him. A whimper escaped his throat. He was back in the kitchen, opening the door only to fall into the blackness of that horrible cellar. No. _No._ He couldn't be thinking about that now...  
  
_No,_ he whispered to himself with a shake of his head. No. Don't think about that.  
  
He took a deep breath and opened the door. The students stopped talking at once, turning to see who it was. Remus fought the urge to turn and run as their eyes fell on him. He took another deep breath and crossed to his desk, the walk seeming to take a million years. There was a small piece of paper on his desk. He picked it up and read it.  
  
_Good to have you back. -Minerva_  
  
With a small smile, Remus put the note aside and took his literature book from his briefcase. He finally looked up to meet the eyes of his students. They were back in their seats, watching him expectantly, almost hungrily, and for a split second Remus felt panicky again. It was a silly feeling. They were just his students. They weren't out to hurt or ridicule him. He took another deep breath, and smiled at them all.  
  
Good morning, everyone. Would you please open your texts to page 321?  
  
He smiled as thirty books were opened and flipped to the right page, breathing in the familiar smell of old books and chalk dust.  
  
It was good to be back.  
  
-The End-  
  
--July 3, 2004 - October 11, 2004--  
  
---  
  
(A/N: Aww, the last chapter. It was tougher to write than I imagined at first. I mean, there's only so far you can go with the self-pity, self-blaming route before it just gets B-O-R-I-N-G. And there also wasn't much more I could think of writing. An encounter between Remus and Mrs. Peasegood seemed necessary, and so was Remus' return to work. I know I never bothered to involve Remus' parents or siblings in the story, though they should have been there for him. Well, let's just say they _were_ there for him, just not in any relevant part of the story. There. That settles that.  
  
I must heartily thank everyone who read and supported this story, as well as Black' (and I must thank everyone for putting up with all my rants about graphic sex scenes and the PoA movie). If it weren't for all your support, enthusiasm (and pictures!), I never would have bothered with writing a sequel to Black' at all. So, -bows- thank you! Arigato! Merci! I love you all for it, and I hope you'll keep supporting my other HP stories (and my anime and video game stories, if you are so inclined). And please keep drawing pictures for me! Seriously, I save every picture I get on my computer as well as printing them out to show off to other people. I genuinely appreciate it!)


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